tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48400195550380801082024-03-13T06:26:08.488-04:00The Philosophy of Time TravelUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-29066351925671346232010-03-25T04:46:00.004-04:002010-03-25T04:47:26.270-04:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKZMt74HGBgxLbRTc2B_fUaf32yP5frGlea43fwHHtrkxDzGcnRv7yoSS2B3OHbSGRp6wEK7EXWOCOAgUxCzyScGK2_7ojaG5ksHIKqEEtNWeEetzC6YaX5nIjJvWzR3RzxNr_rOxG-Gs/s1600/128.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 298px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKZMt74HGBgxLbRTc2B_fUaf32yP5frGlea43fwHHtrkxDzGcnRv7yoSS2B3OHbSGRp6wEK7EXWOCOAgUxCzyScGK2_7ojaG5ksHIKqEEtNWeEetzC6YaX5nIjJvWzR3RzxNr_rOxG-Gs/s400/128.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5452490369689100482" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCW3kcZTFVynSCo2s-HrlsFjLivvzVcWniJdc6Ihme7m5UQm74zd_Zvl03_O6iNRgIho43XTMrU9sUtHemoydEyeaPnggBuI8RqWQa7lUuNZSmgkOsAOwBOn6OxjlQuZ2TbC07ChRZ_2s/s1600/124.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 298px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCW3kcZTFVynSCo2s-HrlsFjLivvzVcWniJdc6Ihme7m5UQm74zd_Zvl03_O6iNRgIho43XTMrU9sUtHemoydEyeaPnggBuI8RqWQa7lUuNZSmgkOsAOwBOn6OxjlQuZ2TbC07ChRZ_2s/s400/124.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5452490286165182034" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBqL0y3EuhG4DpbXnx7QCe8APi022UR9h6ZjeEseUgBNUaAPp5I2ebtG-PVeoLs_hRklZp4kyO-175Y984Ht96IIWOY5BCKTGSrHn5KeVUe1r-EdGIonSKcLFaTazivcCIp1RY7qOkhU0/s1600/129.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 298px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBqL0y3EuhG4DpbXnx7QCe8APi022UR9h6ZjeEseUgBNUaAPp5I2ebtG-PVeoLs_hRklZp4kyO-175Y984Ht96IIWOY5BCKTGSrHn5KeVUe1r-EdGIonSKcLFaTazivcCIp1RY7qOkhU0/s400/129.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5452490212499256018" border="0" /></a><br />These poor guys were abandoned at the Orianna Hill Dog Park last night:Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-46480863006915844282010-01-11T11:42:00.013-05:002010-01-11T16:40:57.392-05:00Bad Movie Night: Avatar (IMAX)<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">My Wife and A Tale of Two Planets<br /><br /></span>Over the weekend, the wife, The Machete and I were finally able to get get tickets for the Imax version of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_cameron">James Cameron</a>'s <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avatar_%282009_film%29"><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span></a>. Both The Machete and I were blown away by "our" version of <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar </span>and its innovative 3-D effects which left us feeling immersed in a beautiful, living alien world.<br /><br />The Wife, however, suffers from a serious <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Astigmatism">Astigmatism</a> - a holdover from childhood surgery to correct a lazy eye (which reappears when she drinks too much). Her movie experience was much different, to say the least, as she was unable to experience the new 3-D technology. Her 2-D version of <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar </span>was a rehashed conglomeration of <a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dances_with_wolves">Dances with Wolves</a>, <a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Titanic_%281997_film%29">Titanic</a>, <a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aliens_film">Aliens</a>, and <a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fern_Gully">Fern Gully</a> among others.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">The Machete and my version of <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span>:<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4-L1KVyAcljVbzxJbGiMi5eqTEOwoTOf67jA8ePGdoI6TeAIdHnksqH7ebzmySOnNg-MgrjPQeLkejXd1wu-1oczFk4ei4gmmFnpXuZtD0ZzG2r-huy1qrWkFCvtsDYDEIzcGDhQ2JUQ/s1600-h/avatar.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 225px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4-L1KVyAcljVbzxJbGiMi5eqTEOwoTOf67jA8ePGdoI6TeAIdHnksqH7ebzmySOnNg-MgrjPQeLkejXd1wu-1oczFk4ei4gmmFnpXuZtD0ZzG2r-huy1qrWkFCvtsDYDEIzcGDhQ2JUQ/s400/avatar.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425531510291196242" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">Like this, only REAL<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;">I had heard nothing but good things about this movie over the last few weeks from several of my most trusted sources, including my friends over at <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a> and <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a>. In fact, SK, who hates all things involved with going to the movies (and fun in general) said the experience reintroduced him to cinema when a little girl in the audience tried to reach out and grab a floating wisp.<br /><br />In my opinion, my friends, many critics and the boatloads of money <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar </span>is taking to the bank are dead-on correct. This movie introduces game-changing film technology. Instead of just sitting back and watching a 2-D story take place on screen, the 3-D film places you on a moving platform where you watch live-action theater in an alien world. The landscape, characters, creatures and technology are all beautiful and very real. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaws_3">This isn't your parent's 3-D movie experience</a>.<br /><br />The three dimensional effects were accomplished using <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avatar_%282009_film%29#Filming_and_effects"><span style="text-decoration: underline;">new</span></a><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avatar_%282009_film%29#Filming_and_effects"> camera technology and techniques</a> created specifically for <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span>. It's impressive. My personal favorite involved strapping cameras to the "alien" actor's heads to capture their facial expressions while they performed. This footage was then digitally enhanced and applied to the CGI characters to great effect. And by "to great effect" I mean the alien <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Na%27vi#Na.27vi">Na'Vi</a> looked as real and emotionally complex as any live actor I've ever seen in heavy makeup. The 3-D aspect adds not only dimensional depth, but emotional depth to the characters as well; you can distinctly <span style="font-style: italic;">see </span>how they feel because the transfer from "real" actor to "CGI" actor was so crisp.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8bo7IsrpFkDBp9Sgdyeq6jUGXcAkHT7sSYAIN9NmpWpADNDtl9AtFc-0Y2YaIeHcMlECMpCDPXbW43hiSZ-oe8B2ZZTo4176AluemW-DuMP2XlGeMR2iK2B97b0EsudCXgnGhEZYxvLE/s1600-h/Avatarmotioncapture.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 219px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8bo7IsrpFkDBp9Sgdyeq6jUGXcAkHT7sSYAIN9NmpWpADNDtl9AtFc-0Y2YaIeHcMlECMpCDPXbW43hiSZ-oe8B2ZZTo4176AluemW-DuMP2XlGeMR2iK2B97b0EsudCXgnGhEZYxvLE/s400/Avatarmotioncapture.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425538437412156562" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">This is impressive. </span><span style="font-style: italic;">Also, The Machete had some very "descriptive"<br />opinions of both <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zoe_Saldana">Zoe Saldana</a> and <a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/5/5e/Avatar%28Neytiri%29.jpg">Neytiri</a>. I will not go into detail.<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;">The story itself was interesting, yet not particularly new, and you can see where it draws directly from other sources for inspiration. LBAM told me of a conversation he had with SK regarding this. They agreed (I think) that to use this technology effectively, you couldn't really have a shiny new story - you need something familiar so the groundbreaking effects aren't lost. I agree wholeheartedly.<br /><br />Tangent Warning: somewhere along the line, James Cameron went to a movie exec and said something like "Hey, can you finance my next movie? I'm going to remake Dances with Wolves in space with a touch of Fern Gully and the robot suits from Aliens, except with giant machine guns. Oh yeah, it's going to be $300,000,000, CGI and in 3-D." And they greenlighted it. Hollywood, home of swinging for the fences, but I digress...<br /><br />The <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avatar_%282009_film%29#Cast_and_characters">casting </a>and performance followed in step with the plot. Every major character's performance was strong enough, but also very familiar - no iconic character boundaries were broken. Don't think of this as a negative - I think this again was intentional. The new technology highlights the ability to turn recognizable actors playing recognizable roles into something far more (and Sweet baby Jesus does it).<br /><br />I feel the best example of this was <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sigourney_Weaver">Sigourney Weaver</a> who just about stole every scene she was in, both human and alien versions, while doing what she does best - delivering smartass, poignant dialog. However, the digital production crew was able to take the recognizable Weaver and turn her into a 10-foot tall, blue alien version of herself. The power of the 3-D technology is clear when you realize the Na'Vi version of Weaver has the exact same familiar smirk and swagger as the real version - every expression was captured and transferred with minimal (if any) error.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEginN_3MbaRUGwggy7xcnns8XJd1fOwjd7OyKLLFeWUxBHDf1Z4c9AXcdH6TFKABcQhD4Zp2PCCqD59fI1GtHG-5DU0HpeZ-zcgKhu6QpZW7w8BCplxAMNN9yOkg-vJTXgUzFJxi46He5M/s1600-h/sigourney-weaver-avatar.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 267px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEginN_3MbaRUGwggy7xcnns8XJd1fOwjd7OyKLLFeWUxBHDf1Z4c9AXcdH6TFKABcQhD4Zp2PCCqD59fI1GtHG-5DU0HpeZ-zcgKhu6QpZW7w8BCplxAMNN9yOkg-vJTXgUzFJxi46He5M/s400/sigourney-weaver-avatar.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425572734639326690" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">The Machete also had similar opinions about Sigourney</span><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Weaver as one of the Na'Vi as he did about Zoe Saldana.<br /></span><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Beyond the comfortable characters and familiar story, however, the setting was the star of this film. The lush world of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fictional_universe_in_Avatar">Pandora </a>in <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span>, when viewed in all it's three-dimensional "holy crap that's CGI" majesty, is absolutely mesmerizing. At times you almost feel like you can reach out and touch one of the glowing wisps flying by your head or feel the moss under your feet. As I said above, you feel like you're on a moving platform traveling through an unfamiliar yet exotically beautiful alien terrain.<br /><br />All in all, I think this was the point of having all the familiar plot lines and characters (and even the score, which The Wife pointed out). Taking these recognizable aspects and putting them in a new, foreign, yet realistic 3-D environment highlights just how impressive this technology is. It can take stories and characters we know and remodel them to involve the audience where they actually feel like they're in the movie. It truly takes a Thor's Hammer to the reality line.<br /></div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">The Wife's version of <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span>:<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaHwUSFntGTaPV7ciQNmUXE9IqJsfd84YAkzdQw_96nfHx5QCKBInVz0QdTDa05SD_SGHAvc9HUT2Px6kkEyMilmJ8yjQAX0kOnBPVtnXY5i2qk4G7ryYwKujHjCatbpZrJbSr5dpWMfs/s1600-h/Wife+Avatar.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 294px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaHwUSFntGTaPV7ciQNmUXE9IqJsfd84YAkzdQw_96nfHx5QCKBInVz0QdTDa05SD_SGHAvc9HUT2Px6kkEyMilmJ8yjQAX0kOnBPVtnXY5i2qk4G7ryYwKujHjCatbpZrJbSr5dpWMfs/s400/Wife+Avatar.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425542612405908418" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">This is pretty much what my wife saw.<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;">30 seconds into Avatar, I leaned over to The Wife, adorned in giant yellow 3-D glasses and heard the phrase I was dreading: "this isn't working for me." She was worried for the weeks leading up to the movie that she wouldn't be able to use the 3-D glasses. That unfortunately turned out to be the case because of her astigmatism.<br /><br />Instead of being transported to the gorgeous jungles of Pandora, she sat in the theater next to me watching yet another "outsider learns from people he's supposed to infiltrate" movie similar to <span style="font-style: italic;">Dances with Wolves</span>. Instead of seeing the way new dimensions added to the CGI characters' expression and emotions, she saw more computer animation on par with <a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=4840019555038080108">Gollum</a> from <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Lord_of_the_Rings_film_trilogy">Lord of the Rings trilogy</a>. Instead of seeing how the colors blended and moved together, she just saw lots of fluorescents and brights on a flat screen. Instead of experiencing something familiar in a completely new and original (and at times mind-blowing) light, her eyes just hurt.<br /><br />In other words, while sitting in the audience, she missed <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span>. Trying to explain to her the "point" of the technology is like trying to explain certain colors to someone who is colorblind - they just can't perceive it. And that sucks because it was awesome. Yeah, The Wife, I am talking directly to you!<br /><br />Seriously though, and all joking aside, I hope that there is a way for people with an astigmatism to begin to experience this technology soon because they are really missing out on a directorial tool that can make the audience feel like they're in another world. And since <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weta_Workshop">WETA</a> (pretty much <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Jackson">Peter Jackson</a>'s personal effects team) worked with this technology on <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Avatar</span>, you have to hope they'll use it for <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hobbit_films">The Hobbit</a>. And I don't want to keep trying to explain to The Wife how cool <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smaug">Smaug</a> looks.</div></div></div></div></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-34393532021181752522009-12-02T11:46:00.009-05:002009-12-02T14:17:36.168-05:00TPTT's Top 5 Albums of the DecadeMy friend and fellow blogger (although I am horribly out of practice) over at <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan </a>had an idea for the two of us, as well as our other friend at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle,</a> to create several "Top 5" lists for this past decade as, you know, it's coming to an end in less then a month! No, I didn't really think about that either.<br /><br />Needless to say, this should be very interesting. While the three of us have <span style="font-style: italic;">similar </span>tastes in many things including books, video games, music and movies, we tend to respectfully disagree a lot. And by "respectfully disagree" I mean make fun of (read: lambaste) each other's opinions. Well, they have <span style="font-style: italic;">opinions</span>, I have <span style="font-style: italic;">truths</span>. The sooner they realize this, the better (for them).<br /><br />So without and further delay, I give you my top five albums of the 2000s...<br /><br />5. <a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tweekend"><span style="font-style: italic;">Tweekend </span></a>by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crystal_method">The Crystal Method</a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkjIs4m6hOKMNgxQVW4EphC5o4IkVttcPUy-a4V9SWzN3EOECB02wn0azSS-sYgW_9kzESBJPBSQoLRJDl_c_1q7Dd8sEo64YQukRsAriDCw7feAQGGx026wMqqcM_CxgkF-Et5KwywLQ/s1600-h/TheCrystalMethod-Tweekend.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 267px; height: 267px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkjIs4m6hOKMNgxQVW4EphC5o4IkVttcPUy-a4V9SWzN3EOECB02wn0azSS-sYgW_9kzESBJPBSQoLRJDl_c_1q7Dd8sEo64YQukRsAriDCw7feAQGGx026wMqqcM_CxgkF-Et5KwywLQ/s400/TheCrystalMethod-Tweekend.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410685689179723522" border="0" /></a><br />Released in 2001 at the beginning of my club-going "party" years (read: not finishing my engineering degree), this album blew my frickken' mind. While I had enjoyed electronic music since first hearing <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orbital_%28band%29">Orbital's</a> <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halcyon_%28Orbital_song%29">Halcyon</a> (required listening), this triggered some switch in my mind, forcing me to buy turntables and start trying (not very well) to spin.<br /><br />Highlight: The song <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Wild, Sweet and Cool </span>gives me chills. I feel like I'm in my early 20s again when I hear it.<br /><br />4. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stankonia"><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Stankonia </span></a>by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Outkast">Outkast</a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVsWcdBj7G2Tpr4FLWjpEGk8juo1fZiSF3eJKU7BdujT2EYi23ZZgJO6ugeEhg8RNWEVI4hBlBPEw6N8HJIqB2YFdR3TdQW8fNLA-obKBeyJ8BOvmlUQDp7lr8OWlDmtAovi59jopmDck/s1600-h/Stankonia_limited_edition_cover.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 250px; height: 250px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVsWcdBj7G2Tpr4FLWjpEGk8juo1fZiSF3eJKU7BdujT2EYi23ZZgJO6ugeEhg8RNWEVI4hBlBPEw6N8HJIqB2YFdR3TdQW8fNLA-obKBeyJ8BOvmlUQDp7lr8OWlDmtAovi59jopmDck/s400/Stankonia_limited_edition_cover.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410689443588559554" border="0" /></a><br />This album was introduced to me by none other than Soul Kerfuffle while he was DJing back in the day (when we were both cool - ok not really, but we thought so). <span style="font-style: italic;">Stankonia </span>single-handedly got me listening to rap again and I think illustrates just how creative and impressively performed it can be.<br /><br />Highlight: I distinctly remember Soul Kerfuffle putting on <a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/B.O.B._%28Bombs_Over_Baghdad%29">B.O.B. (Bombs Over Baghdad)</a> in our apartment's living room. I didn't know how fast a human being could speak. Now I do. The Wikipedia article says the song is "high-tempo" which could be the single greatest understatement ever.<br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">And now it gets ridiculously difficult as the next<br />three are among my favorite albums ever.<br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">3. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Holes_and_Revelations"><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Black Holes and Revelations</span></a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muse_band">Muse</a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhimWFmYO37eA13DZ84aBy7ZiyBtjNl3rH-dwcKx4PCM0FTsIHvXbvq3HhGbrKpJ7x4rJE1htsHcx6JLXvmnFNv4ad8Qtg_8ou2mYyaLqaGsri4obVVrkDT8fsOjXslJjXeem4llf4XAo0/s1600-h/BHARCOVER.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 250px; height: 250px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhimWFmYO37eA13DZ84aBy7ZiyBtjNl3rH-dwcKx4PCM0FTsIHvXbvq3HhGbrKpJ7x4rJE1htsHcx6JLXvmnFNv4ad8Qtg_8ou2mYyaLqaGsri4obVVrkDT8fsOjXslJjXeem4llf4XAo0/s400/BHARCOVER.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410692590714488466" border="0" /></a><br />Do you know what it would feel like to lovingly run head first into a beautiful wall of sound? Listen to this album and you'll know. It's a huge, epic, layered sound adventure filled with aliens, conspiracies, cowboys, robots and mariachi trumpets.<br /><br />Highlight: The song Knights of Cydonia defines this album and the video is probably one of the best I've ever seen (<a href="http://www.mtvmusic.com/artist/muse_uk_/videos/97580/knights_of_cydonia">link to the video here</a>). My wife says that's how I do martial arts. No one's gonna take me alive.<br /><br />2. <a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mer_de_Noms">Mer de Noms</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Perfect_Circle">A Perfect Circle</a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZRZDUzz3CZ3vbSU52RgjQTz5y9Se0NWKP2ros-7QLHS0STDzCWCLa5K3OAOtgUiB_a3X3hvJ3FD3yZ1qE3A-ngdMicuLh7B7lY2PBQnrflrhdHXsyXwBYg1y9nJVPz1pWLmo77p1z4Qw/s1600-h/A.perfect.circle.mer.de.noms.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 288px; height: 288px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZRZDUzz3CZ3vbSU52RgjQTz5y9Se0NWKP2ros-7QLHS0STDzCWCLa5K3OAOtgUiB_a3X3hvJ3FD3yZ1qE3A-ngdMicuLh7B7lY2PBQnrflrhdHXsyXwBYg1y9nJVPz1pWLmo77p1z4Qw/s400/A.perfect.circle.mer.de.noms.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410699040485371906" border="0" /></a><br />Another one I got from Soul Kerfuffle. This album is beautifully composed and powerfully performed. I'm not sure there are too many song writers out there who can hold a candle to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maynard_James_Keenan">Maynard James Keenan</a>'s lyrics and ability to really convey emotion. You listen to the song <a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judith_%28song%29">Judith </a>and you want to break something in a powerful rage. You listen to <a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/3_Libras_%28song%29">3 Libras</a> and you want to cry. This album is a rollercoaster in every possible way an album can be.<br /><br />Highlight: Either of the previously mentioned songs are like direct-injection aural emotion.<br /><br />1. <a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matter_%2B_Form">Matter + Form</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vnv_nation">VNV Nation</a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiS4G2SSZmUQSQbMIj8CpVCUctS43D-pvqKRYfuLnKDBBYFfpvM1EV5JOjBIgqDlb_JRkhyEBRgwxMplzGxDjNOXcUBxlqJvHhppiG1uEiWY8cwFDV4FtQLFoxtCrlskzQ86JiznSq3_Eo/s1600-h/VNV_Nation_Matter-Form_cover.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 300px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiS4G2SSZmUQSQbMIj8CpVCUctS43D-pvqKRYfuLnKDBBYFfpvM1EV5JOjBIgqDlb_JRkhyEBRgwxMplzGxDjNOXcUBxlqJvHhppiG1uEiWY8cwFDV4FtQLFoxtCrlskzQ86JiznSq3_Eo/s400/VNV_Nation_Matter-Form_cover.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5410701704195345202" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Matter + Form</span> is not just a dark, brooding electronically-laced industrial album. To me (since this is my list and all), much like <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Mer de Noms</span>,<span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"></span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"></span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"></span> it can bring out several powerful emotional responses from anger to sorrow to hopefulness both through the lyrics and the music composition. In my opinion that's what determines and separates incredible albums from good albums.<br /><br />Highlight: The whole thing is impressive. <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Chrome </span>is a great song to beat a punching bag or aggressively ride a bike to. <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Perpetual </span>is downright uplifting (for VNV Nation). The song <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Endless Skies</span> however, reminds me of my wife and my friends every time I hear it which probably makes it my my favorite song of all time.<br /><br />Runners Up:<br /><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Futureperfect">Futureperfect </a>by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vnv_nation">VNV Nation</a><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inhuman_Rampage">Inhuman Rampage</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragonforce">Dragonforce</a><br /><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kid_A">Kid A</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radiohead">Radiohead </a><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span></span><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hissing_Fauna,_Are_You_the_Destroyer%3F">Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer</a> by <a href="http://www.outback.com/">Of Montreal</a><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Used_%28album%29">The Used</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_used">The Used</a><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/From_Here_to_Infirmary">From Here to Infirmary</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alkaline_Trio">Alkaline Trio</a><br /><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bunkka">Bunka </a>by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oakenfold">Paul Oakenfold</a><br /><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Is_On">George is On</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_Dish">Deep Dish</a><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Discovery_%28Daft_Punk_album%29">Discovery </a>by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daft_Punk">Daft Punk</a><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Word_of_Mouf">Word of Mouf</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ludacris">Ludacris</a><br /><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/8_Diagrams">8 Diagrams</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wu-Tang_Clan">Wu-Tang Clan</a><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radiohead"></a><br /><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._Elsewhere_%28album%29">St. Elsewhere</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gnarls_Barkley">Gnarls Barkley</a><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daft_Punk"></a><br /><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kala_%28album%29">Kala </a>by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M.I.A._%28artist%29">M.I.A.</a><br /><br /></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-60597599779755844162009-04-13T10:24:00.004-04:002009-04-13T10:41:26.103-04:00I Lose!!!I have lost my bet with <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">SoulKerfuffle</a>. This is bound to make everyone associated with <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0409459/"><span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen </span></a>in any financially-oriented way VERY upset:<br /><br /><table class="MsoNormalTable" style="width: 224.8pt; margin-left: 0.2in; border-collapse: collapse;" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="300"> <tbody><tr style="height: 18.75pt;"> <td colspan="3" style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 224.8pt; height: 18.75pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="300"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><b><u><span style=";font-size:14;color:black;" ><span style="font-size:100%;">Watchmen Current Results</span><o:p></o:p></span></u></b></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 18.75pt;"> <td style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 18.75pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"><br /></td> <td style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 18.75pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"><br /></td> <td style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 18.75pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"><br /></td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border: 1pt solid windowtext; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >Week<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: solid solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >Weekly Take<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: solid solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >Box Office Total<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >1<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$55,214,334 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$55,214,334 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >2<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$30,537,659 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$85,751,993 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >3<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$12,388,893 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$98,140,886 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >4<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$5,132,576 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$103,273,462 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >5<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$2,073,104 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$105,346,566 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 38.1pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="51"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >6<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 83.2pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="111"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$1,071,434 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 103.5pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="138"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style=";font-size:100%;color:black;" >$106,418,000 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> </tbody></table><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><img src="file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/ABRADB%7E1/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/moz-screenshot-2.jpg" alt="" /><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><br /></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYUWvXSBMpjMPZh1MUXkRwBOQYVbHBqM4aZ4F6mFbpKfPQTInqVYJlWrL2-ZQ8Rh3qF6NDzAOOizCG0KiS9j3Q_usFlPP8JaDDTJN4fc_eRHWNaeSIiMQVfkcC8v5h5EP7XgIb2n_RS4w/s1600-h/Watchmen+Chart.bmp"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 227px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYUWvXSBMpjMPZh1MUXkRwBOQYVbHBqM4aZ4F6mFbpKfPQTInqVYJlWrL2-ZQ8Rh3qF6NDzAOOizCG0KiS9j3Q_usFlPP8JaDDTJN4fc_eRHWNaeSIiMQVfkcC8v5h5EP7XgIb2n_RS4w/s400/Watchmen+Chart.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5324185891999331714" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></div><img src="file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/ABRADB%7E1/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/moz-screenshot.jpg" alt="" /><img src="file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/ABRADB%7E1/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/moz-screenshot-1.jpg" alt="" /> <table class="MsoNormalTable" style="width: 439px; margin-left: 5.4pt; border-collapse: collapse; height: 843px;" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tbody><tr style="height: 18.75pt;"> <td colspan="3" style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 256.5pt; height: 18.75pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="342"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><b><u><span style=";font-size:14;color:black;" ><span style="font-size:100%;">Predicted Watchmen Box Office</span><o:p></o:p></span></u></b></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"><br /></td> <td style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"><br /></td> <td style="padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"><br /></td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border: 1pt solid windowtext; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;">Week<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: solid solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;">Weekly Take<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: solid solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;">Box Office Total<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">7<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>323,735.06 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;">$106,741,735.06 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">8<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>142,725.82 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,884,460.88 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">9<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>62,923.86 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,947,384.75 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">10<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>27,741.39 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,975,126.13 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">11<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>12,230.41 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,987,356.54 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">12<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>5,392.05 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,992,748.59 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">13<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>2,377.21 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,995,125.80 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">14<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>1,048.04 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,173.84 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">15<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>462.05 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,635.89 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">16<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>203.71 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,839.60 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">17<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>89.81 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,929.41 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">18<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>39.59 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,969.00 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">19<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>17.46 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,986.46 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">20<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>7.70 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,994.16 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">21<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>3.39 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,997.55 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">22<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>1.50 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,999.04 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">23<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>0.66 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,999.70 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">24<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>0.29 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,996,999.99 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">25<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>0.13 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,997,000.12 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">26<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>0.06 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,997,000.18 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> <tr style="height: 15pt;"> <td style="border-style: none solid solid; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 36.55pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="49"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right; line-height: normal;" align="right"><span style="color:black;">27<o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 105.15pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="140"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$<span style=""> </span>0.02 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> <td style="border-style: none solid solid none; padding: 0in 5.4pt; width: 114.8pt; height: 15pt;" nowrap="nowrap" valign="bottom" width="153"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; line-height: normal;"><span style="color:black;"><span style=""> </span>$ 106,997,000.20 <o:p></o:p></span></p> </td> </tr> </tbody></table><br />Of course the math above is just to be funny, so don't hold me accountable. I have a feeling someone at Warner Bros. is definitely being held accountable, however. You know, for all of the millions lost.<br /><br />(Edited to make graph more clear)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-33576624217761482782009-03-16T09:41:00.002-04:002009-03-16T09:54:32.995-04:00FOLLOW UP: Bad Movie Night: WatchmenIn it's second week in the box office, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0409459/">Watchmen</a> was beat out by <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1075417/">Race to Witch Mountain</a>, it's sales falling by approximately 67% to about $18.1 million in it's second weekend (<a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/eonline/20090315/en_top_eo/104481">source</a>).<br /><br />This has prompted a small wager between me and my esteemed friend over at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soulkerfuffle</a>. I believe that Watchmen will eventually cover it's production cost (~ $150 million) through ticket sales while SK claims it will lose money in the theaters. <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a> will act as the fair and impartial judge.<br /><br />My reasoning is that pretty much absolute garbage is slated for release over the next few weeks and <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen </span>can potentially cling on in theaters. That said, it's still almost three hours long and dropping like a rock.<br /><br />We'll see!!!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-41075511426974305272009-03-09T12:06:00.007-04:002009-03-09T12:43:43.642-04:00Bad Movie Night: WatchmenOver the weekend I caught <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0409459/"><span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span></a> with the wife and a few friends (including the gentlemen behind <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soulkerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a>). Ever since viewing the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3orQKBxiEg">stunning trailer</a> and reading the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watchmen">acclaimed source material</a> I had been very excited to see what could be done in the film version. Upon leaving the theater, having a few beers and several rounds of discussions, seeing <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen </span>felt more like I had been on a really terrible date with an extremely attractive person.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbyWjS08Z6gx6FQsKJBPQhB2IMbOMzywUtTwnynbI_1tiwogNfF259_mjWamgkMc9qaHOB4KUW_zsLwaRNl3KVHqeKEtVKsAXDAuDFVJJwy6tQ8aixAqgRF9tO3cWxfRfZt6VblCGOcZI/s1600-h/l_409459_18e44a21.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 265px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbyWjS08Z6gx6FQsKJBPQhB2IMbOMzywUtTwnynbI_1tiwogNfF259_mjWamgkMc9qaHOB4KUW_zsLwaRNl3KVHqeKEtVKsAXDAuDFVJJwy6tQ8aixAqgRF9tO3cWxfRfZt6VblCGOcZI/s400/l_409459_18e44a21.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5311221646141914530" border="0" /></a><br />What do I mean? Well, true beauty is far more than skin deep. <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchman</span>'s gorgeous outter skin includes stunning visuals and several strong performances, but for a movie that really wants that brass ring (and not just a ride on the carousel), it's what's on the inside that counts. Unfortunately this film is plagued by a few aspects that are either truly awful or leave the audience (both those who read the graphic novel and those who haven't) utterly confused.<br /><br />LastBestAngryMan wrote a great review in which he broke the movie down into good, bad, and confusing aspects. I will attempt to do the same, however I'm going to try to limit my comments to three of each: good, bad, and What the Hell? I'm also going to add an "Eh" catagory to list three things that riled a lot of people which I didn't mind and/or care about as much.<br /><br />Let's start with three good things about <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span>:<br /><br />1. Like LBAM I was really impressed with the way many of the characters were portrayed by the actors. Three real standouts were <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0933940/">Patrick Wilson</a> as <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Manhattan#Nite_Owl_II_.28Dan_Dreiberg.29">Dan Dreiberg / Night Owl</a>, <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0355097/">Jackie Earle Haley</a> as <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Manhattan#Rorschach">Walter Kovacs / Rorschach</a>, and <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0604747/">Jeffrey Dean Morgan</a> as <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Manhattan#The_Comedian">Edward Blake / The Comedian</a>. I felt that Wilson successfully captured the abject Schlubbery of the "dysfunctional" Dreiberg, Haley was a very gritty Rorschach, and Morgan was a deplorable human being (aka successfully illustrating to The Comedian to the audience). Casting Director scores points for these guys.<br /><br />Don't worry, that same Casting Director will lose points in a few paragraphs, but I digress...<br /><br />2. It sure was a pretty movie, and I felt for the most part <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0811583/">Zack Snyder</a> was successful in visually translating the graphic novel to the screen - Watchmen was simultaneously georgeous and gritty. 90% of the costumes were spot on and I was impressed how each decade had an authentic look and feel.<br /><br />3. As someone who read the book, I really liked the easter egg exposition, especially the opening sequence, which I agree with LBAM could be one of the best in film history (save for the song choice, but more on that later). Throughout the movie you get a lot of pertinent information about the alternative history as well as the story's current events through little TV clips, newspaper headlines, pictures, signs, etc... Well played, Mr. Snyder.<br /><br />I did like that he had the word "Squid" on one of Ozymandias' doomsday counters as well. Again, well played.<br /><br />Now for the Bad:<br /><br />1. I think about a week before the final cut of <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span>, one of the computer animators found somewhere in his notes that they needed a large, genetically engineered Lynx. "Oh shit" he thought to himself, because he only had $5 left in his CGI budget. That day he went without a Big Mac extra value meal and Bubastis was born.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvg1PjiyV4MJh8Lqt3MZo26-ptBt56f9ACmEbP0etKqZ1JlnkZ_C5IBUHYWK6MhLVIvCfllDKLb8D-_VR77JwGb1BGixZnrpB3OGx25N6cPvmVP33eBPjX13OzhosLaHo5T-JREv-c1Jw/s1600-h/bubastis.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 215px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvg1PjiyV4MJh8Lqt3MZo26-ptBt56f9ACmEbP0etKqZ1JlnkZ_C5IBUHYWK6MhLVIvCfllDKLb8D-_VR77JwGb1BGixZnrpB3OGx25N6cPvmVP33eBPjX13OzhosLaHo5T-JREv-c1Jw/s400/bubastis.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5311223483843308114" border="0" /></a><br />The outcome: Bad Saturday afternoon Sci-Fi Channel movie.<br /><br />2. Super Ninja Anime Action Sequences!!! This disappointed me because half of the time the heroes fought like competantly trained martial artists and the other half they were doing Chinese opera troop wire tricks. Towards the end I was expecting Night Owl to run up a wall and flip kick three guys while yelling "you think you are the guy, but I'm the guy with training in dragon. You shall honor the floor with your presence."<br /><br />Yes, I realize <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Manhattan#Ozymandias">Adrian Veidt</a> catches (more like blocks with his hand) a bullet mid-air in the comic book, but he's supposed to be the absolute pinnacle of human perfection - and the bullet still damages his hand.<br /><br />Movie could have been an hour and a half long if the slow motion fight scenes were shot in real time.<br /><br />3. The ending went off the rails. I'm sorry but by the credits I was literally wringing my hands at the screen. And I'm not even talking about the lack of calamari either - in my opinion that didn't matter as long as it was, well, done in some kind of character-believable manner. Instead we got a healthy dose of Croutching Bubastis, Hidden Manhattan chop-sockey fighting, Silk Spectre with a gun no explanation explanation why she has it, Adrian Veidt acting like Dr. Claw, and Night Owl going off like Luke Skywalker at the end of Empire (and shooting lazorzcanninz to boot).<br /><br />What the Hell?<br /><br />1. Ozymoyeras. No really, Ozymandias looked and was built like Jamie Moyer. Now, I realize that in his 40s Jamie Moyer is an incredible athelete, however he could not pick up over his head and toss a highly trained, formidible 250+ lb man out a plate glass window. The "now you see it, now you don't" accent was also very confusing. Isn't there something to be said for consistency? The above mentioned casting director lost all cred with this one.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGVB7Mhroy1qAQLR8zYgpfgjjQSGt-5ET42p-iqMiMvyJGsyr2Hg66N0qNKvyC4mtKB9AgGxkVA_pRi4IV9w0WZTIs1BQVxI2x5ohQ-FUu07XjB8ilWXmqoKJrINi0szKePt95fLrSvHQ/s1600-h/watchmenpic42.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 268px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGVB7Mhroy1qAQLR8zYgpfgjjQSGt-5ET42p-iqMiMvyJGsyr2Hg66N0qNKvyC4mtKB9AgGxkVA_pRi4IV9w0WZTIs1BQVxI2x5ohQ-FUu07XjB8ilWXmqoKJrINi0szKePt95fLrSvHQ/s400/watchmenpic42.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5311225784711449298" border="0" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">"I am going to teleport a psychic squid into right field"</span><br /></div><br />2. This book was written in the 80s and did not have to be made relevant in 2009. Sorry, but all references to an oil-dependant energy crisis and having "big corporate America" as a confrontational bad guy was kinda lacking. Yes, I realize that in the real world there was an energy crisis in the 80s, but in the book, one of the main concepts was that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr._Manhattan#Doctor_Manhattan">Dr. Manhattan</a> had already solved the U.S. dependance on oil. And he did it without Adrian Veidt's help.<br /><br />3. While the actual movie score was beautiful and well-written, the songs selected for the soundtrack were poor choices at best. I really don't think they fit the decades with which they were placed - seemed more appropriate for <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093058/">Full Metal Jacket</a> than a comic book movie set in the 80s. As per LBAM, all they needed was <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buffalo_Springfield">Buffalo Springfield</a>.<br /><br />And things I didn't care about as much as some people:<br /><br />1. Watchmen is a dark, gritty book and movie - I wasn't disturbed by the over-the-top violence. Trained martial artists and experienced fighters can break joints and limbs given the right opportunity and there is blood when people get shot and/or stabbed. The movie was rated "R" so I went in expecting it. That said, I don't really remember Laurie and Dan killing gang members outright in the alley and the Silk Specter did not carry a gun in the book (until the end when it is clearly explained why). Rorschach and The Comedian were the graphic novel's notable exceptions because these characters weren't vigilantes who "brought 'em in" - they preferred a pine box.<br /><br />2. Sans Calamari. I know I said I didn't like how the ending went off the rails towards the end, however the fact that there wasn't a genetically-altered squid as opposed to some other "<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mcguffin">MacGuffin</a>" didn't bother me. Hell, even the ending that was written could have worked if it wasn't just so clumsily "bull-in-a-China-shop" and paid more attention to details (as per conversations with LBAM and Soulkerfuffle, one second after Moscow got hit with a "Dr. Manhattan blast," 51,000 Russian nukes would have been caterwauling towards DC).<br /><br />3. A lot of people were upset that Archemides, Night Owl's technologically advanced ship, had chain guns instead of fire supression systems and noise emitters, however I didn't mind. That is a matter of personal taste which I realize is in complete contradiction to most of what I've already said. It just think chain guns are cool. Of course they don't really work with the character, but they're awesome anyway. I want a chain gun so I can mount it on my wife's car. That would rock.<br /><br />All in all, I can't say I despise <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen</span>. In the same sense, however, it is still a little disappointing - I was expecting more, even though many people (including <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alan_Moore">Alan Moore</a>) have gone on record as saying it was unfilmable. I think everyone, from cast to crew, did the best they could to create something mass-marketably accessable from something that was designed not to translate that way.<br /><br />So back to the original comparison, <span style="font-style: italic;">Watchmen </span>was a bad date with an attractive person - fun to look at but impossible to truly enjoy on any kind of sustainable level. That is, of course, unless you're good at turning off your ears so you can just enjoy the eye candy.<br /><br />Overall Score: five over <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/search?q=dragon+wars"><span style="font-style: italic;">Dragon Wars</span></a> (ten over being the best, equal to <span style="font-style: italic;">Dragon Wars</span> being horrendous beyond belief).Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-15490521578470870832009-01-08T10:09:00.004-05:002009-01-08T12:24:25.504-05:00Most Anticipated Movies of 2009Once again we stand at the threshold of contention! My friends over at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">SoulKerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a> and I have decided to post our most anticipated movies of 2009.<br /><br />Unlike Mr. Soulkerfuffle, I am an avid movie-goer. I love watching a film on the big screen and usually am accompanied by The Machete and the Jakiddy-Jake in these endeavors. Our standards are notoriously low at times (usually we only require violence and profanity and/or irreverent comedy), but hey, I firmly believe you can really enjoy sifting through the garbage (<a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2007/09/full-review-of-dragon-wars.html">D-War</a>) to find an unexpected gem (who thought <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://tptt.blogspot.com/2008/05/bad-movie-night-iron-man.html">Iron Man</a> would be <span style="font-style: italic;">that </span>amazingly, ridiculously good?). A lot of times "bad" movies are just as entertaining as "good" ones.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">D-War</span> and anything <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ewe_Boll">Ewe Boll</a>-related being the notable exceptions.<br /><br />5. <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1259571/">New Moon</a><br /><br />Ok, before everyone gets into a tizzy and starts questioning whether "those old rumors are true" just hear me out. Every once in a while (ok a lot of times) I drag the wife out to movies I enjoy (with guns and swords and monsters and all kinds of cool stuff). For some strange reason, she usually does not find these movies all that entertaining (with the most notable exception of <span style="font-style: italic;">Iron Man</span>).<br /><br />A few weeks back, I volunteered to see <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1099212/">Twilight</a> (occasionally she has the reading-equivalent of my movie taste) to make up for all of the crap I've made her sit through. Compared with something like <span style="font-style: italic;">Sex in the City</span> or <span style="font-style: italic;">Marley and Me</span> I'll take vampires, mild violence and comically bad lines any and every day of the week to make her happy (and to fulfill my husbandly date-movie requirements).<br /><br />4. <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0796366/">Star Trek</a><br /><br />In the great Star Wars vs. Star Trek war, I am most certainly firmly standing beside Luke Skywalker and Han Solo, lightsaber at the ready. That may have slightly shifted a bit when I saw this:<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/2n8qHdG1GLI&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/2n8qHdG1GLI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br />Holy crap that looks cool.<br /><br />The thing that has me interested, though, is the cast which includes <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0670408/">Nicholas Angel</a> as Scotty, <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0158626/">Roldy</a> as the much-The Machete-anticipated Dr. Sulu (oh myyyyyyyy, will he bring his en-tourage to see this film?), <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0881631/">Eomer</a> as Bones, <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0704270/">Syler</a> as Spock, and goddamned <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0475394/">Darwin Tremor</a> as Kirk!!!<br /><br />I've also included a link to the theme song, which is also <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC73PHdQX04">AWESOME</a>.<br /><br />3. <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1152836/">Public Enemies</a><br /><br /><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Dillinger">John Dillinger</a> as portrayed by <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000136/">Johnny Depp</a>. Do you really need any more reason than that? Ok, well he's being chased by <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000288/">Batman</a>.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh-f_gU8E6oMhXqmlXhw1dyavM9Qng93jxZP3GShJ2Z9e196FxfqU7g8LazPOYpQ7q2g65PyZnNGXTZ6moQykpQ_N9xW8hsnZ8TiOvML1GbrbaBijhtjvSwSrt7mUaZLFvame-ku73a98/s1600-h/John_Dillinger.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 147px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh-f_gU8E6oMhXqmlXhw1dyavM9Qng93jxZP3GShJ2Z9e196FxfqU7g8LazPOYpQ7q2g65PyZnNGXTZ6moQykpQ_N9xW8hsnZ8TiOvML1GbrbaBijhtjvSwSrt7mUaZLFvame-ku73a98/s400/John_Dillinger.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5288965462775578162" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">"Dames. They'll get you every time."<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: left;">2.<span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"> <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0409459/">Watchmen</a><br /><br /></span></span></span></span>While this movie is a <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/2009/01/top-5-anticipated-movies-of-2009.html">blatant ripoff of the first season of Heroes</a>, it should be ok.<br /><br />All joking and button-pushing aside, I agree with Mr. Soulkerfuffle that a lot can and <a href="http://uk.reuters.com/article/governmentFilingsNews/idUKN3035406820081230">has been going wrong</a> with this film. I still hold out hope, however, that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alan_Moore">Alan Moore</a> will burn down every theater and destroy every copy of this film <span style="font-style: italic;">personally </span>if it sucks (after that last <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0311429/">debacle</a>). The script <span style="font-style: italic;">is </span>based on one of (if not <span style="font-style: italic;">the</span>) best graphic novels of all time, so it has a lot of good material to draw off of, if it isn't changed too much.<br /><br />The trailer looks exceptional:<br /><br /><object height="295" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/R3orQKBxiEg&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/R3orQKBxiEg&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="295" width="480"></embed></object><br /><br />Hopefully that's an indication of unbridled awesomeness.<br /><br />1. <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1013752/">Fast & Furious</a><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></span></span></span><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></div></div><br />It seems like only yesterday when I saw the original <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0004874/">Diesel</a>-powered <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0232500/">The Fast and the Furious</a> in the theater. Eight times. No, literally, I saw it in the theater eight times when it was released in 2001.<br /><br />I don't care what you say, the second and third sequels never happened.<br /><br />Even beyond all of the unbelievable cars and stunts, the original 2001 movie was an entertainingly gritty cop/car drama reminiscent of <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0062765/">Bullit</a>. I loved every second of it.<br /><br />Possibly the most badass action movie trailer of all time:<br /><br /><object height="295" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/uNE2YcG1wtk&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/uNE2YcG1wtk&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="295" width="480"></embed></object><br /><br />And no, contrary to popular belief, The Machete was neither consulted for nor performed any of the above driving stunts.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-18243262905931569792008-09-30T11:55:00.004-04:002008-09-30T13:35:26.309-04:00The $700 Billion College Beer RunAs we all know (unless you were living under a rock), the $700 Billion dollar financial bailout plan was nixed in the House of Representatives by a vote of 228 to 205 yesterday. I'm not here to debate the benefits or problems with this plan, so please dispense with any notion of finding any witty or intelligent financial banter in this blog - I am the LAST person anyone should look to for that.<br /><br />What I do find interesting, however, is how the whole thing went down in the Hiz-ouse. It reminded me of one glorious aspect of higher education: the interrelation and group dynamics of late teenagers and early adults with regards to procuring necessary supplies in a hunter-gatherer dormitory situation.<br /><br />In other words, from my read it kinda went down like a college beer run.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigaDo1_6-SudFik36gUuwh8WDmYKE3zW1J3HMOEkLpZNFVdZ2DELBlmzGVrdJF6-G2Qh3S2w7yxvnRpFLCpC3Samhyn246GdUZTNNCTqNQTO9s6C8OXBDOjpU4WN5MM2xv1VOiavVC4k4/s1600-h/TubKegPump.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigaDo1_6-SudFik36gUuwh8WDmYKE3zW1J3HMOEkLpZNFVdZ2DELBlmzGVrdJF6-G2Qh3S2w7yxvnRpFLCpC3Samhyn246GdUZTNNCTqNQTO9s6C8OXBDOjpU4WN5MM2xv1VOiavVC4k4/s400/TubKegPump.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5251867801406017922" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">700 billion ounces of fun. Who </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">wants to do a bailout stand!?!?!?!</span><br /></div><br />The Republicans are that friend with the car and the really good fake ID. They're kind of a dick most of the time but are tolerable and even necessary at times.<br /><br />Nancy Pelosi is the friend with the uncontrollably big mouth who REALLY doesn't like the friend with the aforementioned car and good fake ID. They make a habit of saying the worst thing possible at the worst possible time.<br /><br />Scenario: it's the Friday night before homecoming weekend (the time you absolutely NEED alcohol), and if you're going to party in your dorm room, you really need the dick friend (Republicans) with the fake ID and the car so you can get beer. You don't like it, but sometimes you have to pander to that dick in order to get what you want. You have to thank him profusely, give him like $20, and maybe even let him hang out with you for a few hours while he gives you insight into all of his opinions.<br /><br />Unfortunately, as that dick friend arrives in your dorm room all ready to drive out and get you beer at 6:00 PM on this crucial Friday night, your loud mouth friend (Pelosi) <a href="http://www.usnews.com/blogs/sam-dealey/2008/09/29/nancy-pelosis-financial-crisis-bailout-partisan-train-wreck.html">says something really stupid</a> about what kind of an asshole the other friend is for drinking all the beer left over from last week. You know for a fact that they BOTH drank all the beer last weekend, but hate each other so much that they'll go to the grave trying to shirk the blame off on the other one. The friend with the ID and the car gets really pissed off, and leaves. For the next few weeks all they do is both talk about how the other one ruined homecoming weekend.<br /><br />The end result: no beer for anyone. Then you realize you just need a whole new group of friends.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-46613459528489774222008-06-09T09:01:00.003-04:002008-12-09T08:55:27.808-05:00Bad Movie Night: Indian Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal SkullTrouble in the Middle East. Hair Metal bands like Poison and Bon Jovi. Nintendo craziness. G.I. Joe and Optimus Prime. Ninjas. Rayban sunglasses. Popped collars on pastel Izod shirts. Break dancing. Duran Duran. Salt-N-Pepa. Evangelical Christianity. Skate Boarding and Tony Hawk. Knight Rider. Miami Vice. Star Wars the films. Star Wars the battle for military supremacy. Billy Ray Cyrus. Cocaine. The Police. U2. Indiana Jones. John Stamos and the Olsen Twins. Howie Mandell. New Kids on the Block. Energy crisis. Superman. Sean Astin, Corey Haim, Corey Feldman, Josh Brolin. The Lost Boys. Batman. Robert Downey, Jr (no longer associated with the above mentioned "Cocaine"). Madonna. The Incredible Hulk. Hulk Hogan and Professional Wrestling. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Ozzy Osbourne and Judas Priest. Roger Clemens.<br /><br />Ok, now answer the following question:<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Which decade were all of these things popular in?</span><br /><br />The overwhelming majority of people would quickly answer <span style="font-style: italic;">the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1980s">1980s</a>, </span>and obviously they would be correct, but that would be too easy...<br /><br />Another correct answer would be <span style="font-style: italic;">the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2000s">2000s</a></span>. It seems like all that was old and dated is now new again in an attempt to cash in on the nostalgia felt by people who grew up in the 80s. This is a common marketing scheme used about every 20 or so years when a generation "graduates" to the real world and gets actual access to money (remember how "cool" bell bottoms and pea coats from the 70s were in the 90s...).<br /><br />Now this "80s nostalgia" can be <span style="font-style: italic;">really wicked awesome, dude</span>; who doesn't like watching <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Optimus_Prime">Optimus Prime</a> lay the smackdown on <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Megatron">Megatron </a>(thank you <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Bay">Michael Bay</a> for making things explode) or <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bret_Michaels">Bret Michaels</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flava_flav">Flavor Flav</a> getting the pick of the groupie litter? Neither the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transformers_%28film%29">Transformers</a> movie nor <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock_of_love">Rock</a><span style="font-style: italic;">/</span><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flavor_of_love">Flavor</a><span style="font-style: italic;"> of Love</span> take themselves overwhelmingly seriously, and the result is something very entertaining.<br /><br />But that's the trick. The 80s was not a decade where anything was ever taken seriously except for oil prices and the constant threat of nuclear war and terrorists. When artists of all forms try to use that "80s palette" and notoriety to either do something serious or to cash in, it's obvious and usually not all that great. $400 for Police tickets - come on. The Olsen Twins as fashion icons - seriously? A New Kids on the Block reunion - shame on yourselves for trying to profit off of the lonely women who you enthralled as lonely teens.<br /><br />Yes, this diatribe is going somewhere - right now in fact.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0QIXe7KGO8MnsGpfAuAn7gttPnEBiUfhKzao6kT4p1VEZAF4B7tA6jaIZpm0-FNOv_O6LNeExiJ6YZ1Utp9GzKxo5-R30PHoD8oZwcejKHljYslU6wj1FRAPOJVR0FHG6VJ_CEwfSAaQ/s1600-h/Indy-Crystal-Skull-Wall-Cust3.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0QIXe7KGO8MnsGpfAuAn7gttPnEBiUfhKzao6kT4p1VEZAF4B7tA6jaIZpm0-FNOv_O6LNeExiJ6YZ1Utp9GzKxo5-R30PHoD8oZwcejKHljYslU6wj1FRAPOJVR0FHG6VJ_CEwfSAaQ/s400/Indy-Crystal-Skull-Wall-Cust3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5209902259994831538" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />No single entity has poorly mishandled an 80s legacy worse than <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_lucas">George Lucas</a>. This started with the depressing let down of crappy dialog, smug directing, and epilepsy-inducing cgi in his <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars">Star Wars</a> Episodes I-III. It most recently reared (as in he pretty much just mooned the audience) it's ugly head in the latest <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indiana_Jones">Indian Jones</a> installment.<br /><br />I went to see <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indiana_Jones_and_the_Kingdom_of_the_Crystal_Skull">Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull</a> with a decent cross-section of people: the Fiance, the Peanut, the Jakiddy-Jake, and The Machete (who, like me, likes to watch things blow up). As we sat discussing the movie over a few drinks, the consensus was clear: disappointment.<br /><br />Don't get me wrong - <span style="font-style: italic;">Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull</span> was a decent enough movie. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_Ford">Harrison Ford</a> was extremely entertaining in his reprized roll (you know, getting punched a lot and delivering the sharp, witty lines we all wish we could think of in the moment) and was supported well by the rest of the cast. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karen_Allen">Karen Allen</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ray_Winstone">Ray Winstone</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cate_Blanchett">Cate Blanchett</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Hurt">John Hurt</a>, and even <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shia_LaBeouf">Shia LeBeouf</a> were all impressive. And of course, as always, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Williams">John Williams</a> is an unmatched composer.<br /><br />We all still left the theater feeling a little wanting, though, and it's for a few simple reasons. First and foremost, even though the Indiana Jones stories are typically almost comic-esque <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulp_magazine">pulp </a>serials with unbelievable crazy plots, this latest installment was even too campy for that. Aliens? Come on. I realize that the 40s and 50s were the height of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ufo#Kenneth_Arnold.27s_sighting_and_the_1947_U.S._UFO_wave">UFO/Roswell hysteria</a>, but the theme of the Indian Jones movies has always been the unbelievable nature of supernatural <span style="font-style: italic;">human </span>history. It takes away from (more like strips clean from the bone) all of the old Indian Jones movies when we attribute all aspects of human culture, religion, sociology, etc... to an alien hive mind from another dimension. It is way too much of a ridiculous jump to expect the audience to make and is actually rather insulting.<br /><br />I mean it would be like trying to explain <span style="font-style: italic;">the </span><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Force_%28Star_Wars%29">Force</a> in the Star Wars universe movies in terms of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Midi-chlorian">micro-organisms in your blood</a>... Oh right, that did happen. Thanks again, Mr. Lucas for beating your audience on the head with the plot stick, thereby taking away any tiny modicum of creativity they may have enjoyed. Hell, if I wanted to be <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Luke_Skywalker">Luke Skywalker</a>, does that mean I could just get a transfusion. Nevermind, I digress...<br /><br />This past weekend, the Fiance and I <a href="http://www.netflix.com">Netflix</a>'d the original <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raiders_of_the_Lost_Ark"><span style="font-style: italic;">Raiders of the Lost Ark</span></a>. What we saw let us down even further. From the "extras" we found out that movie was shot in a few months time in locations all over the world almost three decades ago. The result was a far more "real"-looking movie than its recent cgi-dependent sibling. Don't get me wrong, the ants were cool. What I don't understand, however, is how practically every shot had to be done in front of a green screen (hey, Star Wars epsiodes I-III, how the hell are you again?). While yes, the first three Indiana Jones movies purposely had semi-tacky sets adorned with human skulls, waterfalls, painted backdrops, and torches, the computer-generated rainforests and warehouses just looked plain-old fake and made what was supposed to be a bit outrageous into something stupid.<br /><br />Finally, it must be stated that this movie seemed more like a Lucas/<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steven_Spielberg">Spielberg</a> pet vanity project highlighting the height of their creativity (before the clock struck 12:01 AM on 1 January 1990). <span style="font-style: italic;">Indian Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull</span> opened with <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Graffiti">American Graffiti</a>, played through <span style="font-style: italic;">Indiana Jones</span>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goonies">The Goonies</a>, and <span style="font-style: italic;">Star Wars</span>, and ended with <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E.T.">E.T.</a> and <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Close_Encounters_of_the_Third_Kind">Close Encounters of the Third Kind</a>. The entire time I sat in the theater I imagined both George Lucas and Steven Spielberg on both sides of me, elbowing and whispering "hey, you remember when we did that in our other movie - it was sooooo coooooool back then. Remember? It was really cool!!!" <br /><br />Several moments actually elicited a literal "face-in-palm" - like when Indian Solo (or saw it Han Jones?) stated "<a href="http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/I_have_a_bad_feeling_about_this">I have a baaaaaad feeling about this</a>" reminiscent of the famous line from the Star Wars days. By then end of the film I was half-expecting (ok, three quarters) a light saber fight, One-eyed Willie to be at the end of the Amazonian ruins, and for the "alien hive mind" creature to reach out and touch Cate Blanchett with a glowing orange finger.<br /><br />In a nutshell, even though it (kinda) looked like Indian Jones and it sounded like Indian Jones (at least they kept the original punch effect and John Williams), the narcissistic unoriginality of the project resulted in a less-than-so-so experience you just wouldn't expect from the Indian Jones franchise. That's why this movie is rated as 3.0 <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2007/09/full-review-of-dragon-wars.html">Dragon Wars</a> (out of a possible 10; 1 being the worst, 10 the best).<br /><br />We expected more.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-29024116059036554652008-05-06T12:15:00.003-04:002008-12-09T08:55:27.886-05:00Bad Movie Night: Iron Man<span style="font-size:100%;">A while back, when I found out from the Jakiddy-Jake that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marvel_Studios">Marvel Studios</a> was making an <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_man_movie">Iron Man</a><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_man_movie"> movie</a>, I couldn't have been less interested.<br /><br /><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_man">Iron Man</a> </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:100%;" >the character</span><span style="font-size:100%;"> had never really appealed to me in my comic book-reading days. His alter-ego Tony Stark was some rich, alcoholic businessman who put on a fancy suit to fight crime. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Batman">Batman</a> pretty much did the same thing in a cooler, darker costume. I never got into Iron Man's back story and figured I would lump the movie in with other <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marvel_Comics">Marvel Comics</a> movies like <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghost_Rider_movie">Ghost Rider</a>. In other words, The Machete, the Jakiddy-Jake, and I would see it, discuss it briefly over a few beers, and promptly forget about it.<br /><br />Then, during one "bad movie night" we happened to catch the preview:<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vhgzIM-9lfA&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vhgzIM-9lfA&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br />After viewing the preview, I began to think maybe I had missed something and my initial "eh" reaction I had to the Iron Man character either needed to be revisited and/or updated, because, well, the movie looked damn cool and a lot of stuff blew up. From my basic understanding of the character, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Downey_Jr.">Robert Downey, Jr.</a> seemed a perfect fit for Tony Stark as well.<br /><br />So this past weekend, I drug the </span><span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:100%;">fianc</span><span style=";font-family:georgia;font-size:12;" ><span style="font-size:100%;">é (it took a lot of convincing) and The Machete (no convincing necessary) to see <span style="font-style: italic;">Iron Man</span>.</span> <span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br />All three of us, <a href="http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/iron_man/">as well as many critics</a>, were absolutely amazed. The movie was extremely well-written, well-cast, and well-directed. It was an extremely tight movie and nothing went flying off the handle towards either the "too much" or "too little" extreme. Everything from the character development to the action and fighting to the modest and believable romance were patiently timed and executed in an exemplary fashion.<br /><br />I can only say good things about this movie - <span style="font-style: italic;">Iron Man</span> gets the maximum "Bad Movie Night" rating of 10 times <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://theithacan.org/blogs/collegeave/files/2007/11/poop.gif">Dragon Wars</a> (click on that link). <br /><br />I would like to throw this in as well: I guess on a certain level I relate to Tony Stark. No, I'm not saying I'm an engineer with ridiculously crazy ideas (and a computer named 'Jarvis' which I talk to) who likes to drink and whose body is kept properly functioning with metal medical pieces (I'm not saying that's not true, however).<br /><br />Sometimes events occur that make people feel like everything that is wrong with the world has true control over their life. Not to give too much away about the movie (or my personal life), but there is a scene in </span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:100%;" >Iron Man </span><span style="font-size:100%;">where Tony Stark destroys his workshop in a fit of rage while testing new enhancements to his Iron Man suit. It's that look Robert Downey, Jr. gives that combines frustration, anger, empathy, and loss. I've seen that look before.<br /><br />Tony Stark, I know how you feel.<br /><br /></span></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg0P2QCJxaan-vsxmIEfAO3sSkRzf4y34AFbsLqSMCCCVP-4NqXB-1emHQGWCFzV3VZBPgVA6sgeEIIZBKxbf_YKe_-jNiZvEklt-r384j5TCHIXLpEg3tfSDbHjPCuQEWqPHg-nr2Hd4/s1600-h/ironman-08preview-lg.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg0P2QCJxaan-vsxmIEfAO3sSkRzf4y34AFbsLqSMCCCVP-4NqXB-1emHQGWCFzV3VZBPgVA6sgeEIIZBKxbf_YKe_-jNiZvEklt-r384j5TCHIXLpEg3tfSDbHjPCuQEWqPHg-nr2Hd4/s400/ironman-08preview-lg.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5197310830001298994" border="0" /></a></span><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-17513164587933648582008-05-02T16:35:00.004-04:002008-05-02T16:46:32.490-04:00What Kind of Thinker are You?And we're back!!!<br /><br />Just a brief post today. My fiancé sent me <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/leonardo/thinker_quiz/">this survey</a> from the BBC. It's actually rather interesting, and I think my results are dead on. Of course hers are pretty much diametrically opposed to mine, which speaks to the validity of this survey.<br /><br />:-p<br /><br />Here are my results (it gives you your two "thinker" types)<br /><br /><strong><span style="font-style: italic;">You are a Spatial Thinker</span><br /><br /></strong><strong>Spatial Thinkers:</strong> <ul><li>Tend to think in pictures, and can develop good mental models of the physical world.</li><li>Think well in three dimensions</li><li>Have a flair for working with objects</li></ul><strong>Other Spatial Thinkers include</strong><br />Pablo Picasso, Michelangelo, Isambard Kingdom Brunel<br /><br /><strong>Careers which suit Spatial Thinkers include</strong><br />Mechanic, Photographer, Artist, Architect, Engineer, Builder, Set designer<br /><br /><br /><strong><span style="font-style: italic;">You are a Logical-Mathematical Thinker</span><br /><br /></strong><strong>Logical-Mathematical thinkers:</strong> <ul><li>Like to understand patterns and relationships between objects or actions</li><li>Try to understand the world in terms of causes and effects </li><li>Are good at thinking critically, and solving problems creatively</li></ul><strong>Other Logical-Mathematical Thinkers include</strong><br />Isaac Newton, Archimedes, Albert Einstein<br /><br /><strong>Careers which suit Logical-Mathematical thinkers include</strong><br />Physicist, Chemist, Biologist, Lawyer, Computer programmer, Engineer, Inventor<br /><br /><br />Anyone who knows me understands this is pretty accurate, except it does not mention computer games or rpgs...Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-9104153333239353932008-03-19T13:05:00.013-04:002008-12-09T08:55:28.765-05:00The Great Video Game Debate, Take 7: Role Playing GamesWell, kids, it's time for the final installment of <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a>, <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a>, and my little running debate on the best and worst games of all time. For our grand finale, we will be presenting our choices for the best <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Computer_role-playing_game">role playing video games</a> of all time.<br /><br />For me personally, computer RPGs will never quite match the fun, camaraderie, and creativity of tabletop games. Since you are interacting with a computer through pregenerated situations, your actions and creativity are somewhat limited and the characters will never truly truly 100% be exactly what you want. In my opinion, the games with the best and most involving stories, settings, and characters are by far the best computer RPGs since they can bring the player the closest to the experience of tabletop gaming.<br /><br />Now, a quick word of recognition: computer role playing games today would not be what they are if not for <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Gygax">Gary Gygax</a>, the creator of Dungeons and Dragons. Even today, the mechanics he developed for tabletop role playing games have been automated and digitalized to provide the engines for just about every role playing computer game today.<br /><br />That said, let's get on with the list, shall we:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#5 </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_bloodlines">Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines</a><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"> (PC)</span><br /><br />This game, much like <a href="http://tptt.blogspot.com/2008/01/great-video-game-debate-take-3.html"><span style="font-style: italic;">Rune</span></a>, was a bargain-bin impulse purchase that turned out to be extremely entertaining. Based off of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Wolf%2C_Inc.">White Wolf, Inc.</a>'s <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire:_The_Masquerade">Vampire: The Masquerade</a> tabletop RPG and set in the company's "<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_of_Darkness">World of Darkness</a>" version of Los Angeles, you find yourself a new fledgling vampire with a dead master and a huge debt to pay.<br /><br />The computer version's game play is incredible and from my (very) brief experience with the tabletop <span style="font-style: italic;">Vampire</span>, the character development (a key to all RPGs) was very accurately modeled. Clans, skills, and factions all seem to correspond nicely with the d6 system and the storyline (which is very well-developed) allows progression for any number of different character builds (stealthy, brute force, charming, etc...)<br /><br />By far the best aspect of the game, however, are the numerous and unique characters and your interaction with them. The conversations are well-written, the voice acting is some of the best in any game, and the characters are deep, well-conceived, and all have interesting agendas and back stories (especially<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Characters_of_Vampire:_The_Masquerade_-_Bloodlines#Therese_and_Jeanette_.28Tourette.29_Voerman"> Therese and Jeanette</a>).<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRNK92sUkC_piLzM_bmVsHpXFCTWgE-1AtBvIICvNKX5G076zGm_qkmp_4_5JD_xpDZZSaqa7X1Yie3QVndoot5YBNickYD-rPaO88hZJTwXCVEE31F3k178LFIKbYWDkMNZnUwHmSgEE/s1600-h/vampire_bloodlines_big3.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRNK92sUkC_piLzM_bmVsHpXFCTWgE-1AtBvIICvNKX5G076zGm_qkmp_4_5JD_xpDZZSaqa7X1Yie3QVndoot5YBNickYD-rPaO88hZJTwXCVEE31F3k178LFIKbYWDkMNZnUwHmSgEE/s320/vampire_bloodlines_big3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179547824174538562" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />There's a lot of goth vampire chicks too.<br /><br />Unfortunately, most people have never played this game - it had the poor luck of being released around the same time <span style="font-style: italic;">Half Life 2</span>.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#4 </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neverwinter_Nights_2">Neverwinter Nights 2</a><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"> (PC)</span><br /><br />Let me start off by saying the game has a lot of problems. The gameplay is repetitive ("yay, another dungeon crawl"), the feats don't work like they do on tabletop D&D, and the first solid hour of the game is so damn boring that I put it down for two years and didn't play it again until recently (I'll get into that later in the blog post, however).<br /><br />So then what about <span style="font-style: italic;">NWN2</span> is so great that it overcomes all the negative to make it on to this list?<br /><br />Easy. Characters. The first <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neverwinter_Nights">Neverwinter Nights</a> was a great dungeon crawl game with a cool plot and some fun characters who never really developed all that much. In its subsequent iterations, the <span style="font-style: italic;">NWN</span> Series has consistently improved upon the interactions with <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-player_character">non-player characters</a> by allowing more characters into a party and, well, making them not like each other.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">NWN2</span> takes this to a whole new level with about twelve characters who can join and leave your party and many other non-party NPCs, all of whom have very different personalities, agendas, likes, dislikes (usually other characters in the party), etc... The most entertaining part of the entire game is watching them sling one-liners at each other.<br /><br />Mechanically, your actions and words affect your standing with each and every one. Neglect the Elf Druid by traveling too long with the Tiefling Rogue and things are gonna get downright catty. Help the little angry Dwarven Fighter along his path to become an enlightened monk and he'll be your friend for life. Or you could always just join in when the Evil Human Ranger mocks the Gnome Bard. Now that's fun for all. In all honesty, this game has made the greatest strides towards a genuine tabletop feel. You know, except for the "meh" plot (unbelievably awesome at times, unplayable at others) and extremely boring and repetitive gameplay...<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOmMuvN1qgTIEuEP_mbcZXjbLqSH7-t1Jb5dJtik7FviM_DRFjNR7NW4fEgkZnAfJptEZUelLgeaucrHve85K7yrMn1V2SzQ_Rv8wk1olCBEQC-CUZrpd3eZHj0VgJ0BCm8_Bj2B60td8/s1600-h/NWN2.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOmMuvN1qgTIEuEP_mbcZXjbLqSH7-t1Jb5dJtik7FviM_DRFjNR7NW4fEgkZnAfJptEZUelLgeaucrHve85K7yrMn1V2SzQ_Rv8wk1olCBEQC-CUZrpd3eZHj0VgJ0BCm8_Bj2B60td8/s400/NWN2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179560228040089474" border="0" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span>Pretty much the game in a nutshell.<br /><br /></span></div><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"><br />#3 </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Elder_Scrolls_IV:_Oblivion">The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion</a><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"> (PC)</span><br /><br />Oblivion is the perfect marriage of my two favorite game genres: first person shooters and role playing computer games. It's challenging, involving, graphically beautiful, and absolutely one of the most open games I've ever played. There is so much to do in this game that it's borderline ridiculous. You can walk across the entire continent, pick up every fork on a table, open every dresser, talk to every person, <span style="font-style: italic;">rob every person</span>, etc...<br /><br />Honestly, the game gives you options like no other: you can develop your character with any combination of skills or morality you can think of. You really can do almost whatever the hell you want. As long as you can get away from the city guards.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Oblivion</span> takes it's proud place on this list because of this obscene amount of freedom (take note <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsidian_Entertainment">Obsidian</a>) combined with great writing, development, graphics, sound, music, and of course, voice talent.<br /><br />Come on man, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patrick_Stewart">Patrick Stewart</a> won an award for his portrayal of the Emperor!!! Just listen...<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/nGyw_0IG5s0&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/nGyw_0IG5s0&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">#2 </span><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jade_empire">Jade Empire</a><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;"> (PC/XBox)</span><br /><br />As I said above, for me, a game's ability to tell a good story is one of its most critical aspects. I absolutely love games like the <span style="font-style: italic;">Half-Life</span> series, <span style="font-style: italic;">Oblivion</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Warcraft III</span>, and the <span style="font-style: italic;">King's Quest</span> series, all of which I believe tell some of the best and most interesting stories.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Jade Empire</span>, to me, is truly exceptional even when compared to the best of games. Personally, I think it delivers one of the most enthralling stories of any RPG ever developed. Great characters, "good/evil" mechanics, and gameplay really help move the story along nicely. Add in phenomenal graphics and music and you have one of the best games of all time (which may be true simply by the amount of awards it has won).<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/kVpl4eKn3aY&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/kVpl4eKn3aY&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br />You'd think <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ang_Lee">Ang Lee</a> directed it.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#1 </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secret_of_the_Silver_Blades">The Secret of Silverblades</a><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"> (PC)<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN_y577FdPrwLcu6xZ6jXJYtyYOTaujgAps39RsgGwh6U3AclSEbWmBFIysaAjqcIswKrW7CXbkYjObsYk22iHSHEc_KmIxmZolpxMmVA9uCCWFPbsHyQM_nxDnH0XVCgJYFd6wxeMDhM/s1600-h/240px-SecretOTSB-Title.png"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN_y577FdPrwLcu6xZ6jXJYtyYOTaujgAps39RsgGwh6U3AclSEbWmBFIysaAjqcIswKrW7CXbkYjObsYk22iHSHEc_KmIxmZolpxMmVA9uCCWFPbsHyQM_nxDnH0XVCgJYFd6wxeMDhM/s320/240px-SecretOTSB-Title.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179547287303626530" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />Yeah, I said it - an old school <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gold_Box">gold box</a> <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeons_%26_Dragons">AD&D</a> game from <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TSR%2C_Inc.">TSR</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategic_Simulations%2C_Inc.">SSI</a>. The graphics were all right, the gameplay archaic, and I don't even remember the story line. I don't even know how or when I came into possession of this game. In fact all I remember is that it was fun cutting down Red Dragons and that I couldn't play it in front of my grandmom because she thought Lucifer was going to tear through the screen and rip my soul into the netherworld.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBV3v7qlScdwpOEE-sgxOKeYszNZHSGCQBzwwV3DdUooo8DGJY1bqSIVRb3xJAqzLWf-rNJb3weD5Uk_3t2rDaZe9cKNh2NnsH7Q8vupYIbARDuLAHz0pzto0BPRSDqJV8upYvjBuwa1A/s1600-h/screenshot892-1.gif"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBV3v7qlScdwpOEE-sgxOKeYszNZHSGCQBzwwV3DdUooo8DGJY1bqSIVRb3xJAqzLWf-rNJb3weD5Uk_3t2rDaZe9cKNh2NnsH7Q8vupYIbARDuLAHz0pzto0BPRSDqJV8upYvjBuwa1A/s320/screenshot892-1.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179547506346958642" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />Honestly, though, only one fact is important here - it was my introduction to role playing games in general. My grade school buddy came over one day and said his brother played Dungeons and Dragons. Next thing I knew I was rolling up my first character. Then I got the books (which nearly sent my grandmom catatonic - she got over it in time). Then I got the supplements. Then I started playing with a few friends in college.<br /><br />I am the proud geek I am today because of this game.<br /><br /><br />Honorable Mentions: the 1st <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy_%28video_game%29">Final Fantasy</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fable_%28video_game%29">Fable</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darklands_%28computer_game%29">Darklands</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neverwinter_Nights:_Hordes_of_the_Underdark">NWN: Hordes of the Underdark</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars:_Knights_of_the_Old_Republic">Knights of the Old Republic</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragon_Warrior">Dragon Warrior</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_messiah">Might and Magic: Dark Messiah</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gladius_%28video_game%29">Gladius</a><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Game I should play: </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baldur%27s_gate_II">Baldur's Gate II: Shadows of Amn</a><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"> (PC)</span><br /><br />Every person who's opinion I respect says this RPG has the best story, hands down. Embarrassingly, I've never played it. Guess I'm going to have to get on that...<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Biggest Disappointment: </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsidian_Entertainment">Obsidian Entertainment</a><br /><br />Instead of coming out with a worst RPG of all time (even though it probably would have been that pitifully boring and repetitive <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silverfall">Silverfall</a>), I'm just going to briefly mention Obsidian Entertainment in general. Yes, I know<span style="font-style: italic;"> Neverwinter Nights 2</span> is an Obsidian Game and is on my <span style="font-style: italic;">best RPGs</span> list. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars:_Knights_of_the_Old_Republic_II_The_Sith_Lords"><span style="font-style: italic;">Knights of the Old Republic 2</span></a> has several great aspects as well.<br /><br />The problem isn't that Obsidian makes horrendously bad games, it's that the games they develop, much like Detmer quarterbacks, never live up to their potential. They take successful game franchises like <span style="font-style: italic;">Neverwinter Nights</span> and <span style="font-style: italic;">Knights of the Old Republic</span>, spruce them up with pretty graphics, cool features, and some of the best characters in any game, write some interesting plot twists and turns and hooks, and then leave such huge gaping holes (especially with the endings) that players feel cheated.<br /><br />Poor form, Obsidian. Hire someone to write endings for your games.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-73502544989710581132008-03-19T09:36:00.004-04:002008-12-09T08:55:29.109-05:00Bad Movie Night: 10,000 BCThe other night, The Machete, The Jake-iddy-Jake, and I decided to take in <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0443649/"><span style="font-style: italic;">10,000 BC</span></a> and see what all the hype was about. I have to say the movie was extremely watchable. I also have to disclose, however, about 95% of the "watchability" was due to the obscene amount of Grey Goose I had before hand which made its sheer wretchedness seem funny (much like that night I broke my ankle).<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhV2ViquuFawnhFQ0BjojKkNbH8AouDTGBZBgsy9z2wF7R3KJq-ZLyJPg81Z-RVryRDz1iaTjxuC3y9ovED7Z_DW66Dv5-pCIZva6y1JfU1_yXlrntgIQM342mJj9_Nkjo_ABARjL5wFNQ/s1600-h/10000bc_teaser_thumb.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhV2ViquuFawnhFQ0BjojKkNbH8AouDTGBZBgsy9z2wF7R3KJq-ZLyJPg81Z-RVryRDz1iaTjxuC3y9ovED7Z_DW66Dv5-pCIZva6y1JfU1_yXlrntgIQM342mJj9_Nkjo_ABARjL5wFNQ/s320/10000bc_teaser_thumb.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179465883144720386" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />The stunning pain I felt the next morning (which may have been more from the movie than the booze) made me realize that <span style="font-style: italic;">10,000 BC</span> was very much akin to another cinematic masterpiece: <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.imdb.com/find?s=all&q=dragon+wars&x=0&y=0">Dragon Wars</a> (<a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2007/09/full-review-of-dragon-wars.html">full review here</a>). To put it very bluntly (and about as eloquently as it deserves), just about every aspect of this movie was sub-par at best (save for the CGI). Direction, acting, and writing all join together like a drunken <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voltron">Voltron</a> to stumble around for about two hours before completely falling apart into a vile lump of garbage.<br /><br />Now, I am currently reading Graham Hancock's <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fingerprints_of_the_Gods">Fingerprints of the Gods</a>, a book which presents evidence of "advanced" cultures which <span style="font-style: italic;">may have</span> existed prior to the settling of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fertile_crescent">Fertile Crescent</a>. It's a very interesting and involving read, and I guess I figured that <span style="font-style: italic;">10,000 BC</span> would be somewhat akin to that. While the story kinda-sorta hints at the same theories presented in Hancock's book, I failed to read the fine print.<br /><br />For those who don't know, the fine print reads "From the Director of Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow." That basically damns any redeemable concept to a hell of large and gaudy sets, digitalized catastrophes, vapid dialog, and good old-fashioned heroes who save the day (aka cheesy endings).<br /><br />It is my theory that when test audiences saw the first cuts of the movie, the producers took note of when 90% of the test groups fell asleep. They then recut the movie to include massive CGI animals right at those times as a lame attempt to keep movie-goers from walking out with cheap cinematic parlor tricks. "Hey, maybe they won't notice how poor this is if we throw in a big saber-toothed tiger?!?!?!"<br /><br />It didn't work. While the aforementioned sabertooth tiger, the wooley mammoths, and PCP-addicted giant ostriches were pretty cool, nothing could possibly overcome the absolutely inane dialog delivered by the dreadlock-wearing characters with odd names. "Hey, just throw some hyphens and quotation marks between some vowels - that sounds cavemanish, right?" For additional authenticity, the actors employed the same accent used by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grimlock">Grimlock</a> of the old 1980's Transformers cartoon and the writers added lines about stars, seasons, and agriculture and referred to boats as "birds" or something ridiculous like that.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXpwrCHFvB8aYM35-tZ4JRJUmSy3A2uCK8Oacq5Eb8Z37qWECJGfaFHHdwL9DRocZvNuXux0dxBuM9xvhihYqQMOdysuERcQ8ifUAGqtu-RPfFgFx7pj_Oh5AjVcyB930xAgBf1I91HRY/s1600-h/grimlock2b.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXpwrCHFvB8aYM35-tZ4JRJUmSy3A2uCK8Oacq5Eb8Z37qWECJGfaFHHdwL9DRocZvNuXux0dxBuM9xvhihYqQMOdysuERcQ8ifUAGqtu-RPfFgFx7pj_Oh5AjVcyB930xAgBf1I91HRY/s320/grimlock2b.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179466127957856274" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;">"Me, Tic-Tic, Angry!!!"<br /></div><br />All in all, this movie was mildly entertaining primarily due to the drunken state I saw it in. If I had seen it sober, well, "me, N'de, Angry!!! Want paper color of spring grass with face of previous American chieftain back!!!" Therefore I am going to rate it at a meager <span style="font-weight: bold;">1.25 Dragonwars</span>.<br /><br />(1 Dragonwars = worst movie ever; 10 Dragonwars = really good movie).<br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style=";font-family:times new roman;font-size:12;" ></span></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12;" ></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-77330290617285781352008-03-10T12:27:00.002-04:002008-03-10T12:46:59.863-04:00Mr. Gygax, this is what I learned.A few days back, my friend over at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soulkefuffle </a>emailed me a news link which reported that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Gygax">Gary Gygax</a>, the man credited with developing the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeons_%26_Dragons">Dungeons and Dragons</a> tabletop role playing game, had passed away.<br /><br />Much like Soulkerfuffle, the majority of my wedding party will be made up of friends I have gamed with in the past including (but not limited to) the beautiful and demure Lavanalla, the powerful yet compassionate Severus Thrax, and my kindred spirit Joshua Tasden. Even a few of the wily Calico family of thieves from decades ago will make appearances. Who would have guessed that when all the Frost Giants have been tripped and the burning silos reduced to cool embers, that Bradje would eventually settle down? Not Bradje, that's for sure.<br /><br /><br />Sparkle Sparkle<br /><br /><br />But I digress...<br /><br />Despite generally being viewed by the public as something very "nerdy" or "geeky," the character development and storylines played out in a Dungeons and Dragons campaign can have a very real and positive effect on the participants (unless your <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeon_Master">DM </a>gets pissed off at one of your good 20-sided dice and throws is off a sixth-story balcony). This is especially true when you get to "game" with the great story tellers, actors, and mathematicians (I'm looking at you, Keflen, king of the number crunchers!!!) who you are extremely good friends with and who honestly know you well.<br /><br />If you look past the swords and spells and monsters and maidens, you will see the situations and interactions present in tabletop gaming can really be a window into your own soul and personality. For me, the best characters I've ever played were little adaptations and aspects of my "real life" character. To the uninitiated this sounds weird (and nerdy - how can you relate to a 200 year old fireball hurling elf?), but to those who've seriously "role played" before, you know exactly where I'm coming from.<br /><br />Thanks to the hard work of Mr. Gygax, I know myself a little better. From my time in Eberron, the Forgotten Realms, Ravenloft, serving time on "the wall," etc... I've learned a few things. I'd like to take a few seconds to relate some of them. So without further ado...<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Five things I've learned playing D&D:</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">"Experience" defines us</span><br /><br />D&D has an inherent system for advancing characters. As you "do things" like slaying a dragon, negotiate a treaty between rival kingdoms, use skills, etc..., you gain "experience points" which are used to gauge how powerful (what level) you are. The more "experience" you have, the stronger your character is. <br /><br />In order to truly advance and understand what you're capable of on many levels, however, you need to seek out more "worthwhile" experiences. Killing the same old weak skeletons and zombies day after day does nothing for character - you need to find things which better test you and from which you can learn. Save a princess, fight a dragon, get your masters degree, learn a new language, find a new job, or tell that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lich">lich </a>where he can shove his <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ioun_stones">ioun stones</a>!!!<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Never back down</span><br /><br />Now I'm not saying "never back down" in terms of getting damn near killed mouthing off to the 15th level half orc barbarian when you're a 3rd level gnomish bard and the guy accidentally bumped into you and is apologizing.<br /><br />What I am saying, however, is when you're staring down the forces of the abyss and all of "humanity" is on the line, that is the time to make your stand, no matter how hopeless it may look. When presented with an ethical judgment, go with your character. Don't steal that cursed sword, don't sign off on that design when you know it's flawed, don't trust that crazy bitch Vincenna, and when your guide turns on you and is about to chop the rope that's dangling you over a miles-deep gorge, flip upside down and shoot him in the face with a fire arrow, then let your halfing friend chop him to bits when you finally catch him.<br /><br />The decisions you make and the stands you take not only define you to other people, they inherently become part of you and can guide your actions in the future.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Learn from and accept mistakes</span><br /><br />So you've made a deal with <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baphomet">Baphomet </a>to exchange part of your immortal soul for extreme power? So you've been seduced by the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swanmay">Swanmay </a>and are now 9 months away from parental responsibility? So you've sent one of your friends to the grave (again, but this time permanently damning him to eons of torture) with a not-so-judicious use of a spell called <span style="font-style: italic;">Phantasmal Killer</span>? So you've let some aging human knock your beutiful elven self up? So you've left a path of destroyed towns and burning silos in your wake? I will do everyone I know a favor and not start spouting off real world scenarios that include me jumping off railings, taking years to graduate, buying a Saab, etc...<br /><br />Deal with it. Running away from problems only makes them worse (ask Bradje). With every mistake comes the opportunity to learn, correct, and make up for your (usually bone-headed) actions, at least on some level. Mistakes, while embarrassing and painful at times, build character - at least you know the consequences of your actions and what not to do next time.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Friends will always be there to help, but will never let you live things down</span><br /><br />Sometimes a Frost Giant just needs to be tripped over a ledge to show him who's boss. And sometimes a character needs to be grabbed by said Frost Giant as it's tumbling over the cliff for him to realize that such undertakings may not be most rational plan. <br /><br />And sometimes a friend steps up and saves you with a column of air at just the right time to prevent you from falling to your untimely demise. Or they take your keys when you really should be operating a motor vehicle. Or drives you to the hospital when you jump off a 15 foot railing and crack your ankle. Or pulls you away from a burning silo before you do more damage.<br /><br />It's true, your best friends in life will be there for you no matter how many times you muck things up. It is also their right (and comedic privilege) to make sure you never do something so damn stupid again by reminding you of how stupid you were.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">You need to take chances/Nothing is ever hopeless</span><br /><br />And that's why you roll the dice. All of the armies of the abyss could be closing in on you. A millennium-old vampire and his thralls could be staring you down. The evil god of pestilence and disease could have your brother's soul. You may not think you're qualified for the job. She may not be everything her friend talks her up to be. <span style="font-style: italic;">You </span>may not be everything her friend talks <span style="font-style: italic;">you </span>up to be.<br /><br />It doesn't matter the situation, you'll never know the outcome unless you take the shot. It could be a calculated shot. It could be from the hip. It could turn out perfectly and the world could be saved. It can strike a protective rune and decimate an ancient elven society. <br /><br />No matter how much of a long shot, if the outcome could be worth it, you need to let the 20-sider fly.<br /><br /><br />And now, as a parting word to Mr. Gygax: Thank you. You have not only provided us with access to fun, excitement, and a host of kindred spirits, but also to a lot of character development and "growing up." We are the people we are today in part because of your work.<br /><br />Huzzah.<br /><br />Challenge.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-59359654611427353562008-02-27T15:38:00.016-05:002008-12-09T08:55:30.898-05:00The Great Video Game Debate, Take 6: First Person ShootersAnd welcome back. Next up in the "friendly" video gaming discussion between my friends over at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/2008/02/great-videogame-throwdown-first-person.html">LastBestAngryMan</a> and myself is <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_person_shooter">First Person Shooters</a>.<br /><br />Finally.<br /><br />Ok, admittedly the last category, <a href="http://tptt.blogspot.com/2008/02/great-video-game-debate-take-5-sports.html">Sports Games</a>, was not my "cup o' tea," if you will. To answer LBAM's question, no, I don't really play "real" sports games (i.e. football, baseball, etc...) all that often. I can see the draw, but I prefer watching games and getting my ass royally kicked by Robo-Chuck (The Machete) in fantasy sports. Just not my thing.<br /><br />What is my thing, however, is the First Person Shooter (FPS) genre. I have loved them since the first time I stepped into <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolfenstein_3D">Castle Wolfenstein</a> at a friend's house in 1992. I have played just about every major-release FPS on the market as well as many more lesser-known and indy titles. Along with good <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Computer_role-playing_game">RPGs </a>and the <span style="font-style: italic;">Civilization </span>games, they are my absolute favorites.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNXg6kA1HXZE890o9qxaTKkb1eCUfVgRoZ5SF9bwws9PTsLHFB57FiSnERqornC9RH-jp-XHfjENyaiFOhvjENcXZsY0I69nGVVy6GpuxYn3-YKrvR6nR0hI6c4_QQpzU-_p_7LjJ0z0Q/s1600-h/newwolf_11.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNXg6kA1HXZE890o9qxaTKkb1eCUfVgRoZ5SF9bwws9PTsLHFB57FiSnERqornC9RH-jp-XHfjENyaiFOhvjENcXZsY0I69nGVVy6GpuxYn3-YKrvR6nR0hI6c4_QQpzU-_p_7LjJ0z0Q/s320/newwolf_11.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171764075379646834" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;">Die, Nazi scum!!!</span> </div><br />First person shooters aim to fully emmerse players in the gaming environment. The gamer in essence "becomes" the one staring down the barrel of a gun or running from zombies. Many people find this perspective much more involving. It allows for "direct" interaction with the gaming environment, which can translate into a more personal experience.<br /><br />Yeah, I know, I need more involvement when playing games. But I digress...<br /><br />I think the first thing to take into account when looking at FPS games is platform/input device. While consoles like the PS3 and Xbox 360 have made leaping strides in recent years with multi-axis controllers, it is still my opinion that these games are best played on a computer using a mouse and keyboard, which allows for a faster and more presice range of motion and a far more customizable setup. It is true that console systems have "keyboard and mouse" controllers, but it generally doesn't feel as "crisp" as a real computer setup. With that said, however, all you need to do is look at sales figures for the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_%28series%29">Halo</a> series to see how that is changing.<br /><br />Anywhoo, and without further ado...<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#5 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condemned:_Criminal_Origins">Condemned: Criminal Origins</a> (PC/Xbox 360)</span><br /><br />Frank Rooke, the Monolith Lead Designer for Condemned, said in an interview that aspects of the game were inspired by <span style="font-style: italic;">Silence of the Lambs</span> (the procedural investigation), <span style="font-style: italic;">Se7en </span>(the cat-and-mouse between the main character and the main villain), and <span style="font-style: italic;">28 Days Later</span> (shear deranged human brutality). You can find the interview <a href="http://www.sega.com/games/game_temp.php?game=condemned">here</a>.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Condemned</span> takes those aspects and creates an incredible game that is scary as hell and downright frantic at times. You play the part of an FBI agent who was just framed by a serial killer. Your search to catch him and clear your name takes you through all kinds of dark and eerie places including slums, abandoned buildings, and subways. <span>The game</span><span style="font-style: italic;"> </span>very successfully plays every trick possible on your eyes and ears until you sit completely (and gleefully) paranoid at your computer.<br /><br />The game takes entertaining (and challenging) steps towards semi-realism. Instead of an unending stream of "bad guy" soldiers and evil monsters, most enemies are vagrant drug addicts or gang members hooked on a new PCP-meets-crack drug that makes them nervous and violent. Guns are very few and far between in the game, break easily when misused, and can not be reloaded. Most of the time you find yourself ripping a piece of conduit off the wall or picking up a piece of iron rebar with concrete attached to defend yourself. The hand-to-hand combat system is very well done for a FPS.<br /><br />There is a plan for a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condemned_2:_Bloodshot">sequel</a>. Unfortunately, however, it is only planned for Xbox 360 and Playstation 3, which makes me want to stomp around angrilly.<br /><br />The absolute most important aspect of this game, however, was that it finally lets me, albeit in a pixilated fashion, rip the arm off of one of those industrial office paper cutters and hit someone with it. Don't even try to tell me you've never thought about it.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqSwTP7BJxjdL1t5xzv8OAewbaVkTRHhwo99eWBKC8HQrdQOn_-xgswYJqd6cfcoezmOzV88_R3ZmrP_7aDcSh1OFJi4F0fL9tXSyA_bqzNlcK4nWXZEKdLfUABPzhawKxpn6YHRM2ODM/s1600-h/papercutter.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqSwTP7BJxjdL1t5xzv8OAewbaVkTRHhwo99eWBKC8HQrdQOn_-xgswYJqd6cfcoezmOzV88_R3ZmrP_7aDcSh1OFJi4F0fL9tXSyA_bqzNlcK4nWXZEKdLfUABPzhawKxpn6YHRM2ODM/s320/papercutter.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171767068971852178" border="0" /></a><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyP8et6COklr6cy5NbTRjn9I2thc4fyUMeqQqBpkjzdO93isGM95QJrb2N7yaCowARF5XZDNuWPeOTBUu8p5HcoHIuMfrc3lwLaDlGt3_UVY40hTr0jGz5t_voZPBhL0xMJZpdD3_hrxU/s1600-h/Paper+Cutter.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyP8et6COklr6cy5NbTRjn9I2thc4fyUMeqQqBpkjzdO93isGM95QJrb2N7yaCowARF5XZDNuWPeOTBUu8p5HcoHIuMfrc3lwLaDlGt3_UVY40hTr0jGz5t_voZPBhL0xMJZpdD3_hrxU/s320/Paper+Cutter.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171766978777538946" border="0" /></a>Tell me you've never thought about it before...<br /></div><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#4 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/S.T.A.L.K.E.R.:_Shadow_of_Chernobyl">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl</a> (PC)</span><br /><br />Admittedly this game was gunning to be my "worst FPS game" until about two weeks ago. Not because it's bad - quite the opposite - it's an incredible game. It just took a few miserable weeks to get the bugs out. I'd literally sit there and almost be able to play a great game. Frustrating.<br /><br />But that is neither here nor there now that I figured out the problem and completely reprogrammed the damn thing to work right (if you need any help with crashes, send me a private email and I can help).<br /><br />Also, <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span> has the most annoying title in the world to type repeatedly. But I refuse to cut any corners. Enough gripes. On to the good stuff.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R. </span>is loosely based on the classic Russian Sci-Fi novel <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roadside_Picnic">Roadside Picnic</a> by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arkady_and_Boris_Strugatsky">Arkady and Boris Strugatsky</a>. No, I've never read this book, but when a FPS is loosely based on literature (<a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_%28series%29">Halo</a> and the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aeneid">Aeneid</a>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_%28series%29">Half-Life</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Mist"><span style="font-style: italic;">The Mist</span></a>), it statistically has to be good. Maybe I'll read it now that I've finished <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R. </span>takes place in "<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zone_of_alienation">the Zone</a>" - the fallout area around the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chernobyl_Nuclear_Power_Plant">Chernobyl nuclear power plant</a> after a second explosion in the near future. The second disaster leads to several physics anomalies and mutational byproducts called "artifacts." You play a <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span>, a prospector of sorts, who enters the Zone to collect these valuable artifacts. Unfortunately there are other S.T.A.L.K.E.R.s and bandits with the same idea, a military who doesn't think people should be nosing around in the Zone, mercenaries working for wealthy scientists, and packs of mutated wild animals (and people) - all of whom don't want you to succeed.<br /><br />The Zone in <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span> makes for an incredible setting. The whole area is littered with decrepit buildings, burned out military bases, abandoned science centers, and a lot of radiation and physical anomalies. <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span> is almost beautiful in it's bleakness. The most striking aspect is how graphically close the game comes to modern day Chernobyl.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh90aQlPuQleITgD1vi17QPShRIQF7nTfZ_ePnbepFoDiGBRCfZLFYiydyFQMp7T0SIm7bin2Csq269yDeG9kVJLsCQUwMcidq0houV2mah_vqhdENOwjqiScf6DCTuPaBsvEl82_50mGk/s1600-h/stalker3.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh90aQlPuQleITgD1vi17QPShRIQF7nTfZ_ePnbepFoDiGBRCfZLFYiydyFQMp7T0SIm7bin2Csq269yDeG9kVJLsCQUwMcidq0houV2mah_vqhdENOwjqiScf6DCTuPaBsvEl82_50mGk/s320/stalker3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171770723989021090" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbaCh0U9fC86z68s4-bk6AHYNDd3zsq7qKSuc5ohrNaCL2Y2Iz3qC5QFvXgChxysS0IHKDJiM4BGlUMt_fpmvjlieEnlB-VRLf7IHSd1BsdX6fVd59QpChXi8U3n_U0aFUDuCxNAXOW9g/s1600-h/pripyat1.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbaCh0U9fC86z68s4-bk6AHYNDd3zsq7qKSuc5ohrNaCL2Y2Iz3qC5QFvXgChxysS0IHKDJiM4BGlUMt_fpmvjlieEnlB-VRLf7IHSd1BsdX6fVd59QpChXi8U3n_U0aFUDuCxNAXOW9g/s320/pripyat1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171825901433872898" border="0" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span>'s dedication to detail is astounding<br />and creepy. Which is the real Chernobyl?<br /></div><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span> is a brutally realistic game at higher levels of difficulty. Different weapons take different bullets, so the really awesome and unique weapon you find may be worth jack when you find out its ammo is difficult to come by. Those bullets tend to be very fatal very fast (and expensive) at lower levels before you find decent body armor. Even then, in <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R. </span>it's only a few shots and you're out. Throw on top of that the fact that equipment degrades with use, guns can jam, and that you have a very limited (realistic) carrying capacity (and food and medical supply weight adds up fast), and you have an extremely tough game.<br /><br />But damn does <span style="font-style: italic;">S.T.A.L.K.E.R.</span> game deliver with regards to action, plot twists (the storyline is very well written), and overall creepiness...<br /><br />Ok, I cheated. I used cut and paste every time I needed to write "S.T.A.L.K.E.R."<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#3 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doom_3">Doom 3</a> (PC)</span><br /><br />When it took <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Id_Software">id Software</a> about 10 years to develop a squel to the classic <span style="font-style: italic;">Doom II</span>, you just knew it had to be good. And was it ever.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Doom 3</span> really fleshed-out the previous games in the series with a great storyline including awesome writing and animated cutscenes. It was difficult enough to challenge even the most veteran of FPS gamers and was extremely entertaining.<br /><br />Where <span style="font-style: italic;">Doom 3</span> was really an innovative viking, however, was in its use of lighting effects. It made you extremely paranoid about every dark corner - you had no idea what, if anything, was about to jump out and grab you. That's why you always lead with the shotgun.<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Qkf5amBjHgQ&rel=1"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Qkf5amBjHgQ&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#2 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quake">Quake</a> (PC)</span><br /><br />The original <span style="font-style: italic;">Quake</span> could possibly be described as a turning point in FPS games. While the storyline was a little mish-mashed (too many cooks in the kitchen a la <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Romero">John Romero</a> and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_McGee">American McGee</a>), it innovated the FPS genre in several areas.<br /><br />Graphically, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quake#Quake_engine">its game engine</a> was the first to use three dimensional models for characters as opposed to two dimensional sprites. This brought another level of "realism" to the game which at the time really pushed the envelope.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlTIdpYTRSCgrz8dGf7rT0TWajM7I7HsuKkxiYsVGORIQFSzyFOD6d9trdcDhcZ9okQrofsXZDlIz9W2kbFyO6iwsQAMaTU3G2N6icvMSniq2simcxXr9zgaSdv8L2vw7u2UKP0YvLOYY/s1600-h/600px-Quake1.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlTIdpYTRSCgrz8dGf7rT0TWajM7I7HsuKkxiYsVGORIQFSzyFOD6d9trdcDhcZ9okQrofsXZDlIz9W2kbFyO6iwsQAMaTU3G2N6icvMSniq2simcxXr9zgaSdv8L2vw7u2UKP0YvLOYY/s320/600px-Quake1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171773734761095618" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />It was also the first game to really bring "<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Free_look">free look</a>" graphics to the forefront. Free look allows the player to look around and target by moving the mouse. Previously in FPS games, the directional keys were used to turn right an left and you targeted whatever was right in front of you. Needless to say, free look let players truly immerse themselves in three dimensional environments. The system has been used in just about every FPS since.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Quake</span>'s soundtrack and effects were written by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trent_Reznor">Trent Reznor</a> which makes it inherently awesome. That's really all I can say about that.<br /><br />Finally, <span style="font-style: italic;">Quake</span> was the first FPS with widespread multiplayer acclaim. People (myself included) spent hours playing, modding, and creating new levels (while they were supposed to be studying calculus) to play online (abusing their college's T1 lines) with their friends (who were also abusing their college's T1 lines).<br /><br />All in all, <span style="font-style: italic;">Quake </span>was the basic model for the overwhelming majority of FPS games today.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">#1 The whole <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_%28series%29">Half-Life</a> series (PC)</span><br /><br />This includes <span style="font-style: italic;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life">Half-Life</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_2">Half-Life 2</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_2:_Episode_One">Half-Life 2, Episode 1</a>, </span>and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_2:_Episode_Two"><span style="font-style: italic;">Half-Life 2, Episode 2</span></a>.<br /><br />If you look on <a href="http://www.metacritic.com/search/process?ty=3&ts=&tfs=game_all&sb=5&game_platform=PC&x=13&y=10&release_date_s=&release_date_e=&metascore_s=&metascore_e=">Metacritic</a>, these above mentioned games are tied with <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baldur%27s_Gate_II:_Shadows_of_Amn">Baldur's Gate II</a> as the greatest PC games of all time with a score of 96 (universal acclaim). There is a reason for that, and it is simple: they are, in fact, the best computer games of all time.<br /><br />Storyline, writing, setting, puzzles, gameplay, graphics, challenge, etc... The <span style="font-style: italic;">HL</span> games have it all and are widely considered masterpieces frequently copied in the genre.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3aZeNfYVLdaT9Bv1-vfkOkepokWdxeCRyuACnUJcBNUVEG-jSLtyXdayDCx2sWPZFbYIgLK8ktak5p_K-vux7QnA79yy37BinO7WBtoGshiPW99VW2TDUf2bWP-8j4rGir8pNNeXC1uY/s1600-h/half-life_vs_halo.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3aZeNfYVLdaT9Bv1-vfkOkepokWdxeCRyuACnUJcBNUVEG-jSLtyXdayDCx2sWPZFbYIgLK8ktak5p_K-vux7QnA79yy37BinO7WBtoGshiPW99VW2TDUf2bWP-8j4rGir8pNNeXC1uY/s320/half-life_vs_halo.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171775856474939858" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Half Life </span>beats <span style="font-style: italic;">Halo</span>.<br /><br />Literally. With a Crowbar.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">For me, on a personal level, nothing comes close to these games for one reason, and one reason only: I used them for maniacal entertainment at Soul Kerfuffle's expense, much in the same way Bugs Bunny used to pick on Elmer Fudd.<br /></div></div><br />After beating him into near submission (just about when he would threaten to quit), my friends and I would allow him to kill us a few times to get his confidence level and excitement up. Then, just when he thought he was getting the hang of it, I would wait for him to take a "tactically superior position," usually on a high cliff or overhang, and then inform him he was standing on a remote detonated bomb.<br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><br />SK: That's it, I've had it, I quit.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">TPTT: Oh come on, just play a little more.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><br />SK: I quit the next time you kill me. I swear to god.<br /><br /></span><span>*Six kills for SK later*</span><span style="font-style: italic;"><br /></span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">SK: Yeah. This is awesome. I'm going to kill your ass with this crossbow again from way up here!!!</span> <span style="font-style: italic;"><br /><br />TPTT: Well, maybe you will.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">SK: What do you mean? I've killed you six times from up here!!!</span> <span style="font-style: italic;"><br /><br />TPTT: Look at your feet.</span> <span style="font-style: italic;"><br /><br />SK: Oh Shit.</span><br /><br /><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death="">*KABOOM!!! - SK, not immediately killed in the blast, then falls to his death*<br /><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><span style="font-style: italic;"><br />TPTT and friends: bwhahahahahaha</span> <span style="font-style: italic;"><br /><br />*Nachos (SK's player name) has left the game*<br /><br /></span><br />It almost made up for the right straight whoppins I got in <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starcraft">Starcraft</a>...<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Special Mention: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_%28series%29">The Halo</a> series (Xbox, Xbox 360, PC)</span><br /><br />I feel I should give special mention to the <span style="font-style: italic;">Halo </span>series. I've played the first and second ones (I do not own an Xbox 360 and am disappointed the third isn't out for PC) and they are enjoyable, well-written, graphically beautiful games.<br /><br />Why not in the top 5 list, you ask? When I played them, I didn't see anything really "new" or "innovative" that made them stand out in particular. Why special mention, then? The <span style="font-style: italic;">Halo </span>series, in my opinion, almost single-handedly updated the FPS for consoles and took them mainstream, and by all means should be commended for that. Hell, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Jackson">Peter Jackson</a> is supposed to produce the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_%28series%29#Film_adaptation">movie</a>. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uwe_boll">Uwe Boll</a> is jealous.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Honorable Mention: <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/F.e.a.r.">F.E.A.R.</a>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quake_2">Quake 2</a>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Descent_%28computer_game%29">Descent</a>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Far_cry">Far Cry</a>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crysis">Crysis</a>, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Call_of_Cthulhu:_Dark_Corners_of_the_Earth">Call of Cthulu</a></span><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Worst FPS Ever: <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.metacritic.com/games/platforms/pc/nravarminthunter?q=nra">NRA Varmint Hunter</a></span><br /><br />The enemy here are squirrels, groundhogs, and parrie dogs, which you blast with a high powered rifle (you sick bastards). If you paid money for this game a) you should be ashamed, b) the last 7 years of American History are all your fault, c) your family tree looks like a telephone pole, and d) Charlton Heston thanks you for the donation.<br /><br /></kaboom></kaboom!!!><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjTdgBNlzhZ52elAljbjeXopa2Kpk5OUBSOo0k5pPV0I2kCzzmbYbFkt4iw2ClgGT8m40wRHseKPvv8LH8_NST3SWhOqUs09REHiIqtZrI9WJ4BFJxuJ1KWJYrGg2r5WJfN9magMqYttU/s1600-h/9411114732621.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjTdgBNlzhZ52elAljbjeXopa2Kpk5OUBSOo0k5pPV0I2kCzzmbYbFkt4iw2ClgGT8m40wRHseKPvv8LH8_NST3SWhOqUs09REHiIqtZrI9WJ4BFJxuJ1KWJYrGg2r5WJfN9magMqYttU/s320/9411114732621.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171778987506098658" border="0" /></a><br /></div><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><br /></kaboom></kaboom!!!></six></six><div style="text-align: center;"><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><span style="font-style: italic;">NRA Varmint Hunter</span>: virtual "big man" training</kaboom></kaboom!!!></six></six><br /><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""></kaboom></kaboom!!!></six></six></div><div style="text-align: center;"><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""></kaboom></kaboom!!!></six></six><br /><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""></kaboom></kaboom!!!></six></six></div><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><six kills="" later="" for="" sk=""><kaboom!!! not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" but="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><kaboom not="" immediately="" killed="" in="" the="" then="" falls="" to="" his="" death=""><br />Highlights from the Metacritic reviews include the following gems:<br /><br />"Throwing rocks at cars would be a more fun game than shooting rats in NRA Varmint Hunter. Playing this game made me feel like a hobo at a garbage dump with a metal detector." - Cheat Code Central<br /><br />"All the thrill of the hunt, without the thrill or hunt." - PC Format<br /><br />"Finally, there’s multiplayer. It doesn’t work. There’s a multiplayer button on the main menu, but it just takes you to the Speedco Web site. That’s ok guys. The game sucks and I doubt shooting varmints along side critterlover678 will make it any better." - G4 TV<br /><br />"The biggest objection I have with the game, aside from it being roughly on par with a facial performed by a living urinal, is that you can't even move." - IGN<br /><br />"I've played Flash-game advertisements that are more fun than NRA Varmint Hunter." - PC Gamer<br /><br />Only one thing could save this game...<br /><br /></kaboom></kaboom!!!></six></six><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-33toLGkG3WvUSOybu5QBMckDbrCU0C9BtDtd-UyVAEfORXG0A21WZ3h1yx4FkeCiTxYe_kqti09jjBygq0pZUtBJB1tnF_1lj6IV5TW9to9dsMfx0fS1FHqvAFhKjU0Q2ptbvKrK1ZI/s1600-h/9411114732621.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-33toLGkG3WvUSOybu5QBMckDbrCU0C9BtDtd-UyVAEfORXG0A21WZ3h1yx4FkeCiTxYe_kqti09jjBygq0pZUtBJB1tnF_1lj6IV5TW9to9dsMfx0fS1FHqvAFhKjU0Q2ptbvKrK1ZI/s320/9411114732621.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171788565283168754" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Only in a game could The<br />Sass be put down this easily<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-41381790145795381862008-02-15T09:53:00.009-05:002008-12-09T08:55:32.429-05:00The Great Video Game Debate, Take 5: Sports GamesTime for part 5 in the "Gentlemanly Discussion" involving my friends at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a> and me. This time we are focusing on the top five (and the worst) sports games of all time. This should be a good one, for rarely does something come along that gets people more riled up than the discussion of sports.<br /><br />Except for <a href="http://server6.theimagehosting.com/image.php?img=6075.jpg">Dwarf Fortress</a>.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#5 </span><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tony_Hawk_Pro_Skater_3">Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> (PS2/Xbox/PC/GameCube)</span><br /><br />Not only one of the highest rated <span style="font-style: italic;">sports </span>games on <a href="http://www.metacritic.com/games/platforms/ps2/tonyhawksproskater3">Metacritic</a>, THPS3 scored a whopping 97 (Universal Acclaim), placing it in the top echelon of gaming in general.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_2V_KDrjrqdhRFkJsjBYoly_UCc7JEU-nIYfds6JMIDXoCKlC5rPLAbk9rnV3Up_oky06rQ12jkeiLtShEr3d41STV6X0v7Qis9BJ9H2gNAzbpFiU-jwt2nvj_hCX58QJ6UvRbfz7tZw/s1600-h/thps3_screen004.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_2V_KDrjrqdhRFkJsjBYoly_UCc7JEU-nIYfds6JMIDXoCKlC5rPLAbk9rnV3Up_oky06rQ12jkeiLtShEr3d41STV6X0v7Qis9BJ9H2gNAzbpFiU-jwt2nvj_hCX58QJ6UvRbfz7tZw/s320/thps3_screen004.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167229496153170162" border="0" /></a><br />Admittedly, when this blogger was a young high school-aged hooligan, he loved skateboarding. I was never really good at it though, and spent more time trying unsuccessfully to <span style="font-style: italic;">"</span><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ollie_%28skateboarding_trick%29">ollie</a><span style="font-style: italic;">"</span> (and sitting around being "alternative" - god I was a dork) than actually pulling off <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yA2WLW18iRQ">real tricks</a>.<br /><br />Needless to say, when I found this game, with its incredible "Create-a-Skater" options, I finally got to live the dream of being able to actually skateboard. Well, the "beggar's version" anyway.<br /><br />Once you get the controls down, you literally can spend hours in any of the expansive levels pulling of amazing trick combos, all while listening to arguably one of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tony_Hawk%27s_Pro_Skater_3_%28soundtrack%29">best soundtracks</a> found in any game.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#4 </span><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wii_sports">Wii Sports</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> (Wii)</span><br /><br />One of the earmarks of a good video game is its ability to enthrall people who aren't "gamers." It was obvious to me that Wii Sports is one of those games when I came home from work to find my fiancée (most decidedly not a gamer) locked in a full-contact "Clash of the Titans"-esque tennis battle with the Wii's CPU. Usually content to sit back and relax with a glass of wine and a book about Medieval Europe, she was hopping around with the Wiimote like a <span style="font-style: italic;">Croutching Tiger, Hidden Dragon</span> fight scene extra. On screen, the little Wii fiancée was backhanding and serving up a storm.<br /><br />I thought I was going to have to consult <a href="http://www.wiihaveaproblem.com/">Wii Have a Problem</a>...<br /><br />What I won't discuss, however, is how that mean old <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/"><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Soul Kerfuffle</span></a> ruined ours and The Machete's fun by teaching us how to beat all the Wii Sports games by sitting on the couch and flicking your wrist...<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYT9oSjZ6g25Q718KdnQxLfqEbNXkL-V8rv2SlsbqDQ8zHNGoTAAlelOGe8_4WZbI5kij8osbHpT2kfrQghWX22Ah_LrO7gHVA5gIHgK1vYSi-C24lxKhSy7_11OhcITevaETqHX-oFCM/s1600-h/Yeager.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYT9oSjZ6g25Q718KdnQxLfqEbNXkL-V8rv2SlsbqDQ8zHNGoTAAlelOGe8_4WZbI5kij8osbHpT2kfrQghWX22Ah_LrO7gHVA5gIHgK1vYSi-C24lxKhSy7_11OhcITevaETqHX-oFCM/s320/Yeager.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167241328788070658" border="0" /></a>The dastardly Soul Kerfuffle is currently plotting in his<br />secret lair how to ruin Wii Sports for people the world over.<br /></div><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />#3 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SSX">SSX</a> (PS2)<br /><br /></span><span>I was sitting in the basement of one of my friend's houses one afternoon several years back, when he asked me if I wanted to try a new snowboarding game. And so it began...<br /><br />SSX is a silky smooth game released with the PS2 in 2000. It received a 93 on <a href="http://www.metacritic.com/games/platforms/ps2/ssx?q=ssx">Metacritic</a> and is generally regarded as one of the better snowboarding (if not sports in general) games out there.<br /><br />Much like <span style="font-style: italic;">Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3</span>, once you learn the controls, pulling off inhuman stunts on challenging and creative courses becomes easy and the challenge is to either best the high score or beat your friend's score. Or you can just try over and over again to pull off the "double back flipping flying squirrel" which is undoubtedly the coolest move ever in all of sports video games.<br /><br />Especially when done with Kaori, the rockinest snowboarder ever, who kinda looks like she walked out of the mind of The Machete...<br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRMmQ77hRLi5g0aX4DMrEtTPbd1wflTSdauz5V9XxBtVI1-LTPEjNsPqxE8EvmLvi1lS8fIAr3H6XMYk18L6uf3u0Vxvc3O6QyJ9VKEVm2UHPYFFgefyTpEhuIkIS3blX8tUIkREJt734/s1600-h/kaori3.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRMmQ77hRLi5g0aX4DMrEtTPbd1wflTSdauz5V9XxBtVI1-LTPEjNsPqxE8EvmLvi1lS8fIAr3H6XMYk18L6uf3u0Vxvc3O6QyJ9VKEVm2UHPYFFgefyTpEhuIkIS3blX8tUIkREJt734/s320/kaori3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167254643186688306" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfqZFYaJVEcPL4djIgc6YNDspnA_iUY7q8-emiS9_L5IsefXqaOiDjQLMn_MVNVl-0tqUbFc842qWyHWsCYVJ6veSxVXMQAQHHIZT7ga9N8sG0QhHCmETuj_QgzKVaHyOMZeB5w926Z2U/s1600-h/kaori2.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfqZFYaJVEcPL4djIgc6YNDspnA_iUY7q8-emiS9_L5IsefXqaOiDjQLMn_MVNVl-0tqUbFc842qWyHWsCYVJ6veSxVXMQAQHHIZT7ga9N8sG0QhHCmETuj_QgzKVaHyOMZeB5w926Z2U/s320/kaori2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167254527222571298" border="0" /></a><br /></div><span><br /></span><span style="font-weight: bold;">#2 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Need_For_Speed_Underground_2">Need for Speed Underground 2</a> (Xbox/PC)<br /><br /></span>To me, this is the epitome of racing game. The physics are great, there is a variety of awesome cars, the locations are amazing, and the sound track is top notch (<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xzibit">Xzibit</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Felix_da_Housecat">Felix da Housecat</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rise_Against">Rise Against</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helmet_%28band%29">Helmet</a>, etc...).<br /><br />There are two aspects of the game that really set it apart from its rivals, however. The first is model <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brooke_Burke">Brooke Burke</a>, who guides you through the entire game. No really, I can't make things like that up. See for yourself...<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoC7g-A1u34gBj7JE3bBblcbInKLFX7f_9zXQI991JaMRY-xTYiqKBIMUkCvvCmfFf_ydy5RLSKtlq2FcWkfyHS7mY98fg8zaeFLg04tVz3kHzEc0xfYzRgOAqWmW6JmLjn4yyNKG8l1g/s1600-h/wp8.3.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoC7g-A1u34gBj7JE3bBblcbInKLFX7f_9zXQI991JaMRY-xTYiqKBIMUkCvvCmfFf_ydy5RLSKtlq2FcWkfyHS7mY98fg8zaeFLg04tVz3kHzEc0xfYzRgOAqWmW6JmLjn4yyNKG8l1g/s320/wp8.3.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167263443574677842" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />The second aspect which takes this game above and beyond is the freedom it gives the gamer. The entire city where the story takes place is completely open: you are free to drive around and explore on your own. You can pick and chose your races as you see fit, and can even use your in-game cell phone to pick race-fights with people who just happen to be driving by when you're out cruising.<br /><br />You also have the freedom to mod your chosen vehicle as you see fit. Any and all body and internal components are available from a variety of real manufacturers. My weapon of choice: a simply venomous little Black Ford Focus, much like the one pictured below, which cleaned the street with every...<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia77JZTe54xXDvV8nUi1xFRn-MfMoRo3mJEEz02olByUzpaUg5-le8UsWJGsSmVSsxBf8-VwoXdVnCn58Yj3MPCNbXlGtjFmBDiAvuXsgl2YRgFy9Um6_xnkfP6YT0nq7tBm89TfIo7Ic/s1600-h/nfsundergroundFocus_070903_1.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia77JZTe54xXDvV8nUi1xFRn-MfMoRo3mJEEz02olByUzpaUg5-le8UsWJGsSmVSsxBf8-VwoXdVnCn58Yj3MPCNbXlGtjFmBDiAvuXsgl2YRgFy9Um6_xnkfP6YT0nq7tBm89TfIo7Ic/s320/nfsundergroundFocus_070903_1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167263078502457666" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />Hey.<br /><br /><br />Why you laughin'?<br /><br /><br />Come one man, seriously...<br /><br /><br />Dude, that car kicked...<br /><br /><br />Cut it out, man!!!<br /><br /><br />Come on, stop laughing!!!<br /><br /><br />Whatever, I thought it was bad ass...<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /><br />#1 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pro_Wrestling_%28video_game%29">Pro Wrestling</a> (NES)</span><br /><br />The 80's were good years to be a child. Play time with your friends wasn't supposed to be "structured and educational." Unlike today, at around 10 years old, kids weren't being prepped (brainwashed) for the SATs, college, and career. Back then a boy was able to enjoy faux pas things like toy guns, giant robots with laser cannons, ninjas, swords, and sports without the intervention of pushy parents.<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/UZJDkYmnPvo&rel=1"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/UZJDkYmnPvo&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br />This is where some of my fondest video game memories were formed. Back in the days of yore, I would stay with my grandmom in the Summer because there were more kids there than in my neighborhood. In between games of war in the morning and baseball in the afternoon, we would pop in Pro Wrestling at lunch and take turns kicking the crap out of each other with our favorite characters.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">All Hail, Kin Corn Karn!!!<br /></div><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsRP8swMpQ8RB2ew4fzp9QhsS4MpKvwzw8FAaWOqRZwjYeUA8ubSGXAC7M2-NOaTeZt_w25RvXeOAm67Es7M6kXaEQcx1BcYqzQhmw49thx7jZlh4YlcWD7FDAMrvGV45Yj4qr0lnPEzs/s1600-h/prow-12.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsRP8swMpQ8RB2ew4fzp9QhsS4MpKvwzw8FAaWOqRZwjYeUA8ubSGXAC7M2-NOaTeZt_w25RvXeOAm67Es7M6kXaEQcx1BcYqzQhmw49thx7jZlh4YlcWD7FDAMrvGV45Yj4qr0lnPEzs/s320/prow-12.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167248660297244946" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Honorable mention goes out to the following games: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Excitebike">Excitebike</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gran_Turismo_2">Grand Turismo 2</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dead_or_Alive_Xtreme_Beach_Volleyball">Dead or Alive Extreme Beach Volleyball</a>, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pigskin_621_A.D.">Pigskin 621 AD</a>.<br /><br />Special mention needs be made of Rockstar's <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/State_of_Emergency_%28video_game%29">State of Emergency</a>. While this is not an outright "sports" game, it did serve as such one drunken afternoon at a friend's house. Carnage and violence in the form of a scoring competition has never been so much fun. I think.<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/zt6ZIQw3d-Y&rel=1"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/zt6ZIQw3d-Y&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Worst Sports Game of All Time: </span><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.codemasters.com/manutd/">Manchester United Club Football</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> (Xbox/PS2/PC)<br /><br /></span><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm4A-t4dATGs1pLC735dTE419V3Og18FkblGqqmQpHsNQ82fksVuZvNnHegAjwklMjfVxW1M-2ID5HOQS4XHj5GxzqdQ4HuyJmaPax7HWYTzZ15tIqgM2TXsgMksju9Tm3a1yUduxcObw/s1600-h/51PJ2BBB6QL._AA280_.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm4A-t4dATGs1pLC735dTE419V3Og18FkblGqqmQpHsNQ82fksVuZvNnHegAjwklMjfVxW1M-2ID5HOQS4XHj5GxzqdQ4HuyJmaPax7HWYTzZ15tIqgM2TXsgMksju9Tm3a1yUduxcObw/s320/51PJ2BBB6QL._AA280_.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167273163085668706" border="0" /></a><br />All <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manchester_United">Manchester United</a> had to do last year was beat <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/West_Ham_United_F.C.">West Ham</a>. That's it. All the much-touted "god's gift" to soccer had to do was top the "low end of the totem poll" in one game and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheffield_United">Sheffield United</a> (aka the <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">MIGHTY BLADES</span>!!!) wouldn't have been relegated. Beat those damn <a href="http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/main.jhtml?xml=/sport/2007/04/28/sfnfro28.xml">Cheaters</a>. Bunch a <a href="http://www.independent.ie/breaking-news/sport/soccer/ferguson-apologised-for-role-in-sheffield-relegation-1049043.html">tired wankers</a>. The whole thing really pissed off <a href="http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/2007/07/how_tough_guy_s.html">Boromir</a>!!! Ok, I never played the game, but I hate it on principle. I'm not bitter or anything.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-73671086560621261862008-01-29T10:36:00.000-05:002008-12-09T08:55:33.741-05:00The Great Video Game Debate, Take 4: SIMULATION/STRATEGYRound 3, FIGHT!!!<br /><br />Ok, our <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adventure_games">Adventure games</a> round wasn't really much of a fight. My friends and fellow bloggers at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle </a>and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan </a>and I all pretty much thought each other's lists were kinda insightful and sorta creative. It was more "oh yeah, I remember that was an awesome game" than "both you and that game suck." All three of us had selections from Sierra's <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King%27s_Quest">King's Quest</a> series, solidifying that they are among the best games ev4r.<br /><br /><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvester_%28computer_game%29">Harvester </a>is still the most wretched piece of sickening fecal garbage ever...<br /><br />But I digress...<br /><br />On to the wonderful world of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strategy_video_game">Strategy </a>and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simulation_game">Simulation </a>games. We've decided to rate these together because so many titles blur the lines of these categories. Hopefully we will will be able to provide more colorful responses to each other's lists.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#5 </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defender_of_the_crown">Defender of the Crown (PC)</a><br /><br />Set in Medieval England, you (a Saxon) find yourself trying to unite the land under one banner to drive those <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norman_Schwarzkopf%2C_Jr.">militant Normans </a>off your island. You can go about this in a number of ways from raiding your foe's castles to large-scale battles. My favorite, of course, was laying siege with a catapult.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrozq_TY-vUBsc_vuTqblKpvB_3bPRaphz0Hl6e-l8yjJ2AiJz1-Zc7rWCsfxrESYlShogK-Lwy4J0XH4-WHYDGWbYcSI-v8Z9dpqT4LbXSQ6fNB-4kq25mthmBtIzNPG9qHv7l3Sn4BY/s1600-h/doc-pict.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrozq_TY-vUBsc_vuTqblKpvB_3bPRaphz0Hl6e-l8yjJ2AiJz1-Zc7rWCsfxrESYlShogK-Lwy4J0XH4-WHYDGWbYcSI-v8Z9dpqT4LbXSQ6fNB-4kq25mthmBtIzNPG9qHv7l3Sn4BY/s320/doc-pict.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160927815535106162" border="0" /></a><br />We played this game all the time back in grade school on my friend's <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commodore_Amiga">Commodore Amiga</a>, which was about 15 years ahead of its time graphically.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#4 Coaster (PC)</span><br /><br />I can barely find any records showing this game ever existed. It was released in 1989 by Disney as the first (I think) "design and ride" roller coaster simulation.<br /><br />Basically you had control over just about everything from height to track turning angle, radius, and pitch to placement of loops and corkscrews. You could even take the upstops off and go flying off the tracks. The design was rated by several computerized "judges" who gave very balanced critiques based on fun factor, speed, drop, and design harmony.<br /><br />The game's physics were amazing. It realistically calculated every aspect of your blueprint and its impact on the human body. Then it allowed you to ride your coaster first-person along with your judges. If the design had bone-jarring turns or traveled too fast through a loop, the judges would not be pleased and your rating would sink. Awesome game that, in a way, made kids think about and enjoy physics.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">#3 </span><a style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warcraft_II:_Tides_of_Darkness">Warcraft II: Tides of Darkness (PC)</a><br /><br />"Zug Zug"<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Warcraft II</span> was the first <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Real-time_strategy">real-time strategy</a> game I truly got into. I remember abusing the Villanova servers with this my freshman year by having massive battles that took several hours to resolve. Generally, all four or five other players would team up on one guy (usually not me because I sucked, as I do with all RTS games). This usually led to a lot of cursing and throwing things.<br /><br />Beyond the multiplayer game, the single player game had a very interesting storyline illustrating the conflict between Humans (aided by elves, dwarves, etc...) and Orcs (aided by trolls, goblins, etc...). What was interesting was if you payed attention to more than just the killing (like I did on my third time playing the game), there were no "clear cut" good guys or bad guys. The game's sequel, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warcraft_III:_Reign_of_Chaos">Warcraft III</a>, further expanded upon these concepts.<br /><br />Then the whole story thing <a href="http://www.wowdetox.com/">went to crap</a>. Who needs story development when you have 3pix 1337 1007?<br /><br />Moving on...<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">#2 </span><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starcraft">Starcraft (PC)</a><br /><br />This is definitely the best RTS ever produced. I made the critical mistake of trying to play this multiplayer against <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a> and my old stoner college roommate. I got my ass handed to me in about 30 seconds. <span style="font-style: italic;">Their </span>battle, however, raged on for hours longer. I can't remember who won (I think it may have been SK due to my roommate passing out at his computer), but there were a lot of "Siege Tanks" and "Carriers" blowing things up.<br /><br />The game is massive and well balanced. The single player game lets you control all three factions: the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alien_%28film%29">Alien</a>-esque Zerg, the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aliens_%28film%29">Aliens</a>-esque "space marines" Terran, and the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMs6oWDoQrY&feature=related">Draenei</a>, errrr, I mean Protoss... Again, much like Warcraft II and III, there is no clear cut "good" or "bad" faction, which I think makes the story line very interesting.<br /><br />I can't wait for <a href="http://pc.ign.com/articles/810/810715p1.html">World of Starcraft</a>!!! I want to see <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a> cry...<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">#1 </span><a style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civilization_%28computer_game%29">Civilization (PC)</a><br /><br />I remember getting this game for Christmas and thinking it may be a clandestine attempt to get me to play a thinly veiled "history lesson" in video game clothing.<br /><br />I was right and to this day <span style="font-style: italic;">Civilization </span>ranks as one of my favorite games of all time (thanks, Mom!!!). I remember loading it thinking "I'll give it a shot." Fired it up, started play as the Egyptians, and within an hour Alexander the Great's tanks and infantry were pummeling the hell out of my phalanx while my precious Egyptian peoples were rioting in the streets.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNh6-ZaJLJp_hR0DjmDLPjfYYqXaiLC3a3o1u0ntEmWqt3NoRGLimxRVipjXd5YOI8YwKN6qrKi8NQ6Cphignw6djlhXKKfR2st1Ko_Wb-PcVb_5CMe_73WL8QYta1JUpB3J-3GJGK0I0/s1600-h/256px-Civilizationboxart.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNh6-ZaJLJp_hR0DjmDLPjfYYqXaiLC3a3o1u0ntEmWqt3NoRGLimxRVipjXd5YOI8YwKN6qrKi8NQ6Cphignw6djlhXKKfR2st1Ko_Wb-PcVb_5CMe_73WL8QYta1JUpB3J-3GJGK0I0/s320/256px-Civilizationboxart.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160949140047730818" border="0" /></a><br />It's a fun game with many real-world geopolitical lessons. You learn that for a world leader, the balancing act between being a well-liked (people celebrating your name, building you a monument, going to work and being productive as opposed to rioting, etc...) and being successful (running a financially stable country, smashing your enemies to bits, advancing technologically, etc...) is extremely difficult, and this game captures it perfectly. <span style="font-style: italic;">Civilization </span>also shows the historical links between significant technological, spiritual, and social advancements which may not always be clear. All in all, it's an extremely entertaining romp through the "ins" and "outs" of world history.<br /><br />Several sequels and spin-offs (<a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colonization_game">Colonization </a>almost made in on this list) to the original <span style="font-style: italic;">Civilization </span>have been created, with the best possibly being the fourth iteration. I needs to stops beings a bum and gets me that game...<br /><br />Other notable games include anything else from the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civilization_%28series%29">Civilization </a>series, any of the <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RollerCoaster_Tycoon_%28series%29">Roller Coaster Tycoon</a> games, <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuck_Yeager%27s_Advanced_Flight_Trainer">Chuck Yeager's </a>(that's always going to be funny to me) <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuck_Yeager%27s_Advanced_Flight_Trainer">Advanced Flight Trainer</a>, the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Star_Wars:_X-Wing_computer_game_series"><span style="font-style: italic;">X-Wing</span> and <span style="font-style: italic;">TIE Fighter</span></a> games, and <a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castles_%28video_game%29">Castles</a>, which I suck at.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Worst Sim/Strategy Game: </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dwarf_Fortress"><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Dwarf Fortress</span></a><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"><br /><br /></span><span>This is one of those "minimalist" or "purist" ASCII text games that programmer snobs with Macs love. Yes, of course the game is incredibly deep, if your idea of fun gameplay is staring at all the little "@"s and "&"s running around your impenetrable stronghold, which is constructed from the best "l"s, "+"s, and "_"s that "$" can buy. Said stronghold, of course is surrounded by the beautiful snow-capped "AAA" mountains to the East and "###" forest to the South.<br /><br />I'm personally waiting for the much anticipated <span style="font-style: italic;">Elf Fortress </span>to be released, with its stunning 3D graphics </span><span>(you need 6gb of video memory</span><span>) and amazing soundtrack (a Danny Elfman, John Williams, Trent Reznor, and RZA collaboration). Its richly developed characters, who you can tell apart not only visually, but by the incredible voice-over acting (Patrick Stewart, Sir Ian McKellen, Andy Sirkus, and Cate Blanchette have already signed on) add to the incredible storyline written by Roberta Williams circa 198X, Christopher Tolkien, and Wang Dulu.<br /><br /><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglABlWUOkIkXkLCUXQe0ZLqv_0HKM1Ia-WDSRx8RTJO9p8pBNBKd6btnVRFOiT-QAsyVn_gBheoZl4lM_V0GJ-JJ8NdejWZownZnhtjEIaHaVUDyYDkh4f1KK0PCvf0h0E26WOLFdo9XI/s1600-h/256px-DwarfFortressBuilding.png"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglABlWUOkIkXkLCUXQe0ZLqv_0HKM1Ia-WDSRx8RTJO9p8pBNBKd6btnVRFOiT-QAsyVn_gBheoZl4lM_V0GJ-JJ8NdejWZownZnhtjEIaHaVUDyYDkh4f1KK0PCvf0h0E26WOLFdo9XI/s320/256px-DwarfFortressBuilding.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160991419705792706" border="0" /></a>An ASCII-based scene from <span style="font-style: italic;">Dwarf Fortress<br /><br /><br /></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieJE0chxE-WMlYVL7E1dRe5QMP0sBL9B8Z9lNfehqW0P2LDcjhHB_pC9LJMwPVzCuJUHByZ1ucybyr0hhHV4Ul0ZVEhzbz0bKZodGJ6qLkJcVdPwZTqctwWxUlGzSMZG8zhmFK76biFUE/s1600-h/Castle_Neuschwanstein-s.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieJE0chxE-WMlYVL7E1dRe5QMP0sBL9B8Z9lNfehqW0P2LDcjhHB_pC9LJMwPVzCuJUHByZ1ucybyr0hhHV4Ul0ZVEhzbz0bKZodGJ6qLkJcVdPwZTqctwWxUlGzSMZG8zhmFK76biFUE/s320/Castle_Neuschwanstein-s.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160991986641475810" border="0" /></a>A fully rendered 3D scene from the upcoming hit<br />game <span style="font-style: italic;">Elf Fortress: Just Better Than Dwarves<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjwj5kK_F20iBvfsThndBbtsBVUtNr9OHxGQyghgl0cr5ppUFjamRpl5XPcj9bHQKFBvtQ4nuSXwhIfjGqEivl6CQg-OwlI8VRUHYeOT4xN9hgZiR2bzEBlaC3Z1OtqNHdU1WPYUn50s8/s1600-h/5192_1280-tongue-out-smiley.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 120px; height: 96px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjwj5kK_F20iBvfsThndBbtsBVUtNr9OHxGQyghgl0cr5ppUFjamRpl5XPcj9bHQKFBvtQ4nuSXwhIfjGqEivl6CQg-OwlI8VRUHYeOT4xN9hgZiR2bzEBlaC3Z1OtqNHdU1WPYUn50s8/s200/5192_1280-tongue-out-smiley.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5161000177144109298" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-style: italic;"></span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-57546577240304438352008-01-25T12:24:00.000-05:002008-12-09T08:55:34.955-05:00The Great Video Game Debate, Take 3: ADVENTUREThe third video game genre my friends at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2008/01/great-game-throw-down-adventure.html">Soul Kerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/2008/01/top-adventure-games.html">LastBestAngryMan </a>and I will tackle will be <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adventure_games">Adventure Games</a>. For those of you just joining, we are posting our "top video game choices of all time" to our respective blogs (by game genre) and then making fun of each other. Simple, really, and entertaining.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#5 <span style="font-style: italic;">Legend of Zelda</span> (NES)</span><br /><br />Simple formula for greatness:<br />1) start with a princess<br />2) have her kidnapped by forces of evil<br />3) battle forces of evil to save her<br /><br />This game really was the first true adventure game I really got into as a kid, and I believe it set the standard for years to come for gamers the world over. I remember sitting around for hours with my friends trying to solve all the puzzles and defeat all the monsters.<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPxuSHC9t0T9JuPfFBLlHdGlW4Axy8zNYAaSdM2q_QopoUsKK2olBg9Aw3oAJqGXLegbzVCDnnQHQfbnzVPMZHlvfD9nxC51Bsmsp2U93rAzBXQjhINufCy2gA7Xm_FTXUy93fI69ghWo/s1600-h/legend_of_zelda_nes_screenshot1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPxuSHC9t0T9JuPfFBLlHdGlW4Axy8zNYAaSdM2q_QopoUsKK2olBg9Aw3oAJqGXLegbzVCDnnQHQfbnzVPMZHlvfD9nxC51Bsmsp2U93rAzBXQjhINufCy2gA7Xm_FTXUy93fI69ghWo/s320/legend_of_zelda_nes_screenshot1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159471645528102962" border="0" /></a><br />Legend of Zelda was probably one of the longest games released at that time, however it never felt repetitive or boring. The game was well balanced and provided a great sense of accomplishment when you finally defeated the evil Gannon and saved the princess.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#4 <span style="font-style: italic;">Rune</span> (PC)</span><br /><br />Once upon a time, <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a> and I went to an electronics store to raid the bargain bins. Standing there before us, in all it's red-tagged glory, was this box...<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipiSBQKy5mUXqHrRr83xepNNePlfczStCPFBY4eWI5DfzunZ264ExDOrWwwVJ6rh0U-NVa-T7stablljuiYYK58xfg_q4JHT82H2T6mcGQu7plHr9IZYzxXn0zP2BPDEFQoA9QZpWhUlw/s1600-h/61JKSHX4EFL._AA280_.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipiSBQKy5mUXqHrRr83xepNNePlfczStCPFBY4eWI5DfzunZ264ExDOrWwwVJ6rh0U-NVa-T7stablljuiYYK58xfg_q4JHT82H2T6mcGQu7plHr9IZYzxXn0zP2BPDEFQoA9QZpWhUlw/s320/61JKSHX4EFL._AA280_.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159473200306264130" border="0" /></a><br />I didn't really care about the storyline (which actually turned out to be pretty cool) - I bought it right away because of the simple unwritten promise between developer and player of being able to smash guys into pulp with a huge honkin' hammer. And it delivered on that promise in spades.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh52hPVqHJbI2fDwWc7JNLgIkiN0oXZMALWESqkX7ycqwKFsVUsMhOnl9etHcuHdJ-Z3wZkaXgAtQgFLmE4GhrsDtnM6tI2z7bU3CE6VXzDHvj0HWk_rSDk7pksGT1QIJmBaT9ZeCe8Y9k/s1600-h/HammerBlows.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh52hPVqHJbI2fDwWc7JNLgIkiN0oXZMALWESqkX7ycqwKFsVUsMhOnl9etHcuHdJ-Z3wZkaXgAtQgFLmE4GhrsDtnM6tI2z7bU3CE6VXzDHvj0HWk_rSDk7pksGT1QIJmBaT9ZeCe8Y9k/s320/HammerBlows.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159474583285733458" border="0" /></a><br />Best $5 I've ever spent.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#3 <span style="font-style: italic;">Grand Theft Auto: Vice City </span>(PS2)</span><br /><br />There are two very different versions of Vice City, however they come on the same disk and are not dependent on the game programming itself. No, they depend on the mood of the player at the time.<br /><br />Version 1 is the "actual" game. It's an intricate story of one man's rise through the ranks of the Vice City crime world. The action is intense, the voice over acting is impeccable, and the plot is incredible. The level of detail is amazing and overall, it's an awesome gaming experience.<br /><br />Version 2 is the "it's 3AM and I'm drunk with my friends" version. I believe this is the version the ESRB is most weary of. This is where you amass as many weapons as possible and go on a relentless killing spree, gunning down or chopping into bits everyone who crosses your path from old ladies to prostitutes to businessmen. This is clearly even better than the "actual" game itself.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#2 <span style="font-style: italic;">Alone in the Dark </span>(PC)</span><br /><br />This game was really groundbreaking at the time. It introduced the fully 3D polygon graphics and different camera angle "scenes" which set the stage for the survival horror games of today (aka the <span style="font-style: italic;">Resident Evil</span> and <span style="font-style: italic;">Devil May Cry</span> series). The controls, while a little shaky, in a way added to the frantic paranoia and the sound effects were eerie and really could get under your skin.<br /><br />Personally, my favorite aspect of the game was how true it was to the mood and setting of it's H.P. Lovecraftian roots (one of my favorite authors). It was dark, a little foreboding and hopeless, and absolutely scared the crap out of me at times.<br /><br />The sequels and Uwe Boll movie were severely less-spectacular. If you missed the first movie, however, don't fear, there's another one planned.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#1 <span style="font-style: italic;">King's Quest IV: The Perils of Rosella </span>(PC)</span><br /><br />By far one of my favorite games of all time. Really, the entire King's Quest series (at least the older ones) could have been listed here, but KQ IV was the first one I owned and played all the way through though.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUqtsm2q74j3eYPf-V_52J_C9KtpsxrZrMFLjf3ALgkBI2hvZr5QWIiBoO8syM4Cv_IdbcCWiQ9v2WV9Vl2YksEdeFbpZB4y1KqEyePhG__tN3JQWoNtXuRlBytz_72jp1eP6aYr255q4/s1600-h/kings_quest_iv.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUqtsm2q74j3eYPf-V_52J_C9KtpsxrZrMFLjf3ALgkBI2hvZr5QWIiBoO8syM4Cv_IdbcCWiQ9v2WV9Vl2YksEdeFbpZB4y1KqEyePhG__tN3JQWoNtXuRlBytz_72jp1eP6aYr255q4/s320/kings_quest_iv.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159483929134569570" border="0" /></a><br />These games made you think. Instead of just pointing and clicking as with today's games (except for <span style="font-style: italic;">Dwarf Fortress</span>), you actually had to type in every single thing you wanted the characters to do from picking up objects to digging up graves. It was intensely challenging, however very rewarding once you progressed. The story lines were well-thought-out and creatively drew upon popular stories and fables without feeling contrived.<br /><br />God I wish they still made games like the old King's Quest series today. Something truly innovative and creative.<br /><br />This list was even harder than the "<a href="http://tptt.blogspot.com/2008/01/great-video-game-debate-take-2.html">Platformers</a>" list to narrow down; there are a lot of Adventure games out there that hook you in with great gameplay and "fun factor" while telling an interesting story. Other notables include <span style="font-style: italic;">Fable</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Tomb Raider</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Jade Empire</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">The Suffering</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">The Immortal</span> (hardest game ever), <span style="font-style: italic;">Diablo II</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Sanitarium</span>, and the original <span style="font-style: italic;">Metal Gear</span>.<br /><br />Now, for the worst Adventure game ever, it came down to three abysmal choices (in my most humble of opinions). The first was <span style="font-style: italic;">Silverfall</span>, which I had a lot of hope for when I purchased, but turned out to be one of the single most boring games I've ever played. The second was <span style="font-style: italic;">The 11th Hour</span>, a rediculous arrangement of cutscenes and puzzles which were supposed to take place in a haunted house. Both, however, pale in comparison to...<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Worst Adventure Game Ever: <span style="font-style: italic;">Harvester </span>(PC although decidedly not "PC") </span><br /><br />Guarantee Eli Roth played this game as a child.<br /><br />I was so excited about this game when I was a teen - it was supposed to be scary and violent and awesome!!! It was clearly not the experience I was hoping for...<br /><br />Your character wakes up with amnesia in a cartoonishly demented nightmare of extreme violence and bigotry. You petty much kill everyone in your small town in an attempt to gain entrance to "The Harvest Temple" to save your girlfriend (who looked like a rejected extra from a Poison video). At the end, you find out it's all a simulation made to create serial killers. You then feel really creepy and dark inside and want nothing more than to take a bath in holy water.<br /><br />I'm including links to <span style="font-style: italic;">Youtube </span>videos taken from the game. <span style="font-weight: bold;">If you are in the least bit squeamish, easily offended (or even pretty thick-skinned), or are around other people, don't click on them.</span><br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aSxhRXRTOI">Harvester 1</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zRs_9tDnCE">Harvester 2</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=er43PMLfBWs">Harvester 3</a><br /><br />Even by my standards, this game is despicable.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-36787980835614505642008-01-23T10:47:00.000-05:002008-12-09T08:55:35.749-05:00The Great Video Game Debate, Take 2: PLATFORMERSNext video game topic for debate between me and my friends at <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soulkerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/">LastBestAngryMan</a> is "the top <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platform_game"><span style="font-style: italic;">Platformer</span></a> game of all time."<br /><br />To begin, we need to mention one title in particular that <span style="font-style: italic;">would have</span> far surpassed all other games in this genre, had it been officially released. Yes, I am talking about <span style="font-style: italic;">Rushan Special Forces</span>. With innovative characters like the Red Machine Gun Man and the Blue Ninja (whose special abilities included the revolutionary "fake jump"), this game was poised for absolute awesomeness. Unfortunately for the developer, plans fell into the hands of Konami, who released their own version, <span style="font-style: italic;">Rush'n Attack</span>, first.<br /><br />But I digress...<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#5 Mega Man 2 (NES)</span><br /><br />It was absolutely ridiculous. You're a little blue robot who runs around and blows up the evil robot goons of the maniacal Dr. Wily. The part that made it so great was after you defeated one of the bosses (Air Man, Wood Man, Metal Man, etc...), you got to use their powers. Crash Bombs forever!!! It's now available as part of the Wii Virtual Console too!!!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#4 Goonies II (NES)</span><br /><br />I may catch hell for this one, but god damn did I love this game, which was loosely based on the movie. Ok, by "loosely" I mean "nothing at all like." You played as Mikey Walsh (aka Sean Astin), shot different monsters and the dreaded Fratellis with a slingshot, tossed around Molitov cocktails, and saved your friends. I can't remember the rest of the plot, but who cares.<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/j_wltikZl1w&rel=1"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/j_wltikZl1w&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#3 Super Mario Brothers 64 (Nintendo 64)</span><br /><br />The thing I remember most about SMB64 was how expansively 3D it was (I believe this really established the 3D Platformer). It was a long and challenging game, but it never got boring. Frustrating at times, but never boring. Extremely well-balanced and fun.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#2 Contra (NES)</span><br /><br />Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start. Just about anyone will be able to tell you what that is. Embedded in the code for this entertaining Platformer was the first extremely well known <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Konami_Code">cheat code</a>. Frustrated gamers everywhere can thank Konami for their insight - now just about every game on the market comes complete with cheats.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#1 Castlevania (NES)</span><br /><br />My fiancee doesn't play video games (except for Wii Sports Bowling) or really have any interest in computers or gaming. She can, however, recognize the Castlevania music within like three notes. That's how you know a game was good - people who aren't "gamers" still remember it. It was extremely challenging (I hated that damn little Igor) and extremely entertaining. And the music was cool. Thankfully, Uwe Boll hasn't realized it never has been made into a movie...<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/IBX3Ls8N0Rk&rel=1"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/IBX3Ls8N0Rk&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br />It was really hard to narrow down this list to the top 5. Other notable runners up include <span style="font-style: italic;">Friday the 13th</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Metroid</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Pac Man</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Altered Beast</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Kid Icarus</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Kung Fu</span>, the original <span style="font-style: italic;">Super Mario Brothers</span>, and <span style="font-style: italic;">Bionic Commando</span>.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Worst Platformer: Gyromite</span><br /><br />Gyromite was one of two games designed to use Nintendo's <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R.O.B.">Robotic Operating Buddy</a>. This piece of useless garbage (it straight up didn't work) was originally packaged with the Nintendo Entertainment System in 1985, but thankfully removed when (and this is just my conjecture) some top Nintendo brass realized the thing was crap. The game was much more fun when incorporating my own version of the R.O.B. - the <span style="font-style: italic;">Real Operating Brother</span>. He just pushed the buttons the lame robot was couldn't manage to hit. The game was fun then.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">***UPDATE***</span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Using advanced computer modeling, we have been able to generate what we believe is an accurate portrait of the </span><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/">Soul Kerfuffle</a><span style="font-style: italic;"> blogger's first child:</span><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXcWRPxn5bWt9VnRwr5SXZKA8xTmtW5hVpr9FlPhXr4QTvJfZYuZMAYPA3F34qKOZUJy48XHpHBvXpxb7JLrlaV52EcaWJ77mF_hvelOnsiwbNxGelLEGKYFl_bNESgQ8ohW25Te6XRhk/s1600-h/gyromite.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXcWRPxn5bWt9VnRwr5SXZKA8xTmtW5hVpr9FlPhXr4QTvJfZYuZMAYPA3F34qKOZUJy48XHpHBvXpxb7JLrlaV52EcaWJ77mF_hvelOnsiwbNxGelLEGKYFl_bNESgQ8ohW25Te6XRhk/s320/gyromite.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159062603331130386" border="0" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-25345192096642226002008-01-22T18:21:00.000-05:002008-01-22T22:30:01.901-05:00Best Games List: Fighting GameTwo very good friends of mine, the bloggers behind <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2008/01/great-game-throw-down-fighters.html">Soul Kerfuffle</a> and <a href="http://lastbestangryman.blogspot.com/2008/01/joint-blog-venture-on-videogames.html">LastBestAngryMan </a>(both very experienced in the <span style="font-style: italic;">arts </span>of video gaming), have decided along with myself that it would be entertaining to post our top (and bottom) video games of all time to our respective blogs. These will be sorted by category and no platform is barred.<br /><br />Why do this, you ask?<br /><br />So we can argue, er, *ahem* - I mean <span style="font-style: italic;">debate</span>, and mock, er, *ahem* again - <span style="font-style: italic;">critique </span>each other's decisions, of course!!!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#5. King of the Monsters (Arcade/Sega Genesis)</span><br /><br />I loved this game in the arcade. It was a total blast to throw "Astro Guy" into a building with Geon, a pretty bad rip-off of Godzilla. The game was originally ported from the arcade to the Neo Geo system, which was pretty much the 90's equivalent of an Alienware computer - extremely over priced. Thank god it eventually wound up on Sega Genesis!!!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#4: Street Fighter II (Arcade/NES)</span><br /><br />My first experience playing a 2D fighting game, and boy was it a blast. It was extremely well balanced - all characters were capable, in the hands of the right person, of taking out any other character. A good model for all of those that followed and a hell of a lot of fun.<br /><br />Unless you were playing one of those jerks who was really good at it.<br /><br />Then you just wanted to "Shoryuken" them.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#3: Killer Instinct (Arcade)</span><br /><br />First and only game I have ever beaten in an arcade with one credit (with Sabrewulf!!!). This game was straight up fun. Yes, it bit off of the Mortal Kombat "ultra violent" video game hype, but made up for it with really cool characters including Fulgore, a big scary cyborg, Sabrewulf, a werewolf, and Spinal, a skeleton. Memorable "No Mercy" moves (yes, a blatant fatality rip) included Orchid, a female character, flashing the opponent and turning him into a frog and Jago, a monk, meditating, which in turn makes a car fall out of the sky onto the defeated foe.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#2: Iron and Blood: Warriors of Ravenloft (PC)<br /><br /></span>No one has ever even heard of this little known computer game, but boy was it fun!!! I mean really, you could play as all kinds of fun characters inspired by the D&D Ravenloft campaign setting, siding with either Chaos or Law. I didn't care who won, I played as an executioner with a huge honking axe or a little goblin wielding two swords.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">#1:</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Mortal Kombat (Arcade/NES)</span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span></span></span></span>Picture it: North Wildwood, NJ circa 1992. Two young brothers approach an arcade. In the distance, they spot a game they have never seen before called <span style="font-style: italic;">Mortal Kombat</span>. Intrigued, the older brother puts in a quarter (games actually cost $0.25 to play then, not $3.00 like today).<br /><br />The older brother previews all of the characters and choses <span style="font-style: italic;">Sub Zero</span>, of course because he looks like a bad ass ninja. The game choses <span style="font-style: italic;">Raiden</span>, who seems like he stumbled off the set of <span style="font-style: italic;">Big Trouble in Little China</span>.<br /><br />Battle begins on what looks like a bridge in the middle of a hurricane. Punches and kicks were exchanged. <span style="font-style: italic;">Sub Zero</span> was electrocuted. <span style="font-style: italic;">Raiden </span>was frozen. In the end, however, the mighty computer prevailed.<br /><br />What happened next changed the way I, the aforementioned older brother, viewed fighting video games for the rest of my life. The screen darkened and a disembodied voice yelled "finish him!!!" <span style="font-style: italic;">Raiden </span>closed in and rocked his staggered opponent with a tremendous uppercut.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Sub Zero</span> then tumbled off the edge of the bridge...<br /><br /><br />Down...<br /><br /><br />Down...<br /><br /><br />Down...<br /><br /><br />INTO A FREAKING PIT OF SPIKES!!!<br /><br /><br />I will never forget the joyous shock of that moment. I looked over and my brother had the same wide-eyed "holy crap" look on his face. To say that wasn't expected was an understatement.<br /><br />Next up my brother played as <span style="font-style: italic;">Kano </span>and the computer chose the previously defeated <span style="font-style: italic;">Sub Zero</span>. Again we fell prey to the wily computer. The screen the darkened again. <span style="font-style: italic;">Sub Zero</span> approached. We were expecting another trip into a pit of spikes.<br /><br />We were very mistaken.<br /><br />Sub Zero grabbed Kano by the neck and ripped his head from his torso, with bits of spinal column following after. Wow. About $20.00 worth of vicious carnage later, I knew damn well I was going to get that game on my Sega Genesis the day it came out.<br /><br /><br />Any game that makes you stare in sheer guilty glee and your unexpectedly impaled is surely the best fighting game of all time. Many have tried to copy, but none were as shocking as the original.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Worst Fighting Game of All Time: <span style="font-style: italic;">Time Killers<br /><br /></span></span>What a load of absolute garbage. This game tried to cash in on the Mortal Kombat "brutal bloody violence" hype.<br /><br />It failed miserably.<br /><br />I don't know what was worse, the graphics, the sound, or the awful gameplay. The characters were impossible to control and looked plain goofy hopping around with their limbs cut off.<br /><br />Horrendous. Absolute pile of steaming fecal explosion.<br /><br />Hey, Strata, I want my $0.25 back. <span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;"><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-style: italic;"></span></span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-40629597512582402842008-01-21T12:29:00.000-05:002008-01-21T16:17:30.276-05:00Bad Movie Night: CloverfieldThis past weekend, The Machete and I were joined by my fiancee for Bad Movie Night: Cloverfield. I have to admit, I believe the three of us were a bit confused coming out of the theater: we couldn't tell if we had just seen a really awesome giant monster movie or a really bad episode of Dawson's Creek. So let us bisect it into its two components and review from there, shall we?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">BAD ASS GIANT MONSTER MOVIE: <span style="font-style: italic;">CLOVERFIELD</span>!!!</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"></span><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Cloverfield </span>delivers in spades when it comes to capturing all of the chaos and confusion that would occur if a giant monster (and its freaky-creepy minions) decided to attack a major metropolitan area. Tension, suspense, and outright fear are used perfectly to steer the audience away from ridiculous disbelief (it's still a giant monster movie) and towards creatively tweaking their "Fight or Flight" response. Claustrophobia, terror, and an overwhelming "rats in a maze" hopeless feeling exude out of every scene.<br /><br />The street level perspective is a great tool. It helps theatergoers realize that in this situation, where a big scary creepy thing is knocking over buildings, expelling evil minions, and eating people like bon bons, no one would really give a rat's ass where it came from or what it was here for until they were far enough away to safely conjecture about it, preferably over a post traumatic stress beer.<br /><br />Most thankfully, there is no "Plot Stick" either. At no point does a scientist or a government agent who somehow has the creature's entire history "break it down" for the audience. The closest the movie comes to that is overheard conversations of people trying to rationalize or guess the creature's origins and motives. They do this while they are running for their lives, of course. And also, while the movie does bear a resemblance to 9/11 media coverage, the "Plot Stick" thankfully keeps from trying to "teach us a lesson" or preach. It's subtle - the imagery really adds to the confusion and fear. Smart.<br /><br />The actual monster and its minions were, for lack of a better term, bad ass. As a whole, it was cool to see the creatures weren't your generic dinosaur-esque fire-breathing lizards on the rampage. Honestly, I think a zoologist would have a hell of a time classifying it, unless there was a general "awesome" phylum. Seriously, it's way more "Lovecraft" than "B-Movie Discovery Channel." The creature gets bonus points for having the wherewithal to rip the head off of Lady Liberty and launch it into downtown Manhattan. Up yours, King Kong!!!<br /><br />But...<br /><br />For all it's cool aspects, there is something holding this movie back from being truly awesome, and I thank my fiancee for this pop culture reference...<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">DAWSON'S CREEK SEASON FINALE: </span><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">CLOVERFIELD</span><span style="font-weight: bold;">!!!</span><br /><br />The (human) main characters are the one truly truly truly weak link in this film.<br /><br />The main story line should have opened with a Paula Cole or Dido song. In a nutshell, and I'm not giving anything away, spoiled twenty-something yuppies act like spoiled twenty something yuppies for the entirety of the movie. You know, during the catastrophic and cataclysmic leveling of New York City, amidst death and destruction and the rampaging of one huge bad ass creature and legions of smaller, creepy, and equally bad ass little creatures, characters who really don't care about anything else but what they want.<br /><br />The main character's motivations and actions are just absurd. Maybe I don't really understand the simple nuances which drive human emotion and love and all, but to risk the lives of friends and siblings to find a girl you've had a crush on and who just walked out with another guy is, for lack of a better term, stupid. And it's not like "I drove to your house in a car with the engine light on in an ice storm" stupid - it's like charging head long into 20 stories of death dealing monster stupid. There is nothing even chivalrous or brave about it. His brother is right when he refers to him as a "douche bag."<br /><br />The only thing possibly more insane than this jackass main character are the other jackasses following him. Hello, my name is Jim Jones, would you like to try my koolaide? I understand the trials that come with loyalty, but seriously though... The moment my best friend starts marching off to save some hussy from a rampaging mega-monster, I'm cracking him over the head with my Sony handi-cam and dragging his ass to safety. Let the guys with the tanks and guns (who are obviously losing) take care of it. Instead these morons bravely march onward into the jaws of death.<br /><br />I don't know, maybe the writers wanted the audience to hate the main character and feel bad for his entourage in the same way you feel bad for an abused pet? Maybe they wanted you to see a bit of Darwinian Karma in action? Heady social commentary about selfishness? I'm not sure, but if the characters had an ounce of precaution, pride, or common sense to guide their actions, then maybe they would be more believable than the monster attack itself. Instead, you find yourself cheering for the monster to eat them. And cheer often, you do!!!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Bad Movie Night Rating:</span> Seven over Dragon Wars (7/10).<br /><br />Cloverfield is certainly entertaining. The main creature is probably the best rendition of a giant monster (all classical respect aside, Mr. Kong and Mrs. Zilla), there is a tangible tension and fear pervading through the film which is great, and the reactions of the people are extremely realistic, save for one moron leading a pack of morons through what looks like a post-9/11 war zone. It's a winner if you can get your mind past all of the "whys" and "hows" of the characters' actions and just enjoy watching them get eaten.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">***I READ AN AWESOME REVIEW FROM THE BOSTON GLOBE AFTER I FINISHED THIS: </span><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.boston.com/movies/display?display=movie&id=10796">CLICK HERE.</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-29743925318475095272008-01-21T11:39:00.000-05:002008-01-21T12:23:36.009-05:00Bad Movie NightI wanted to clear this up before I posted my review of <span style="font-style: italic;">Cloverfield</span>.<br /><br />Over the past few years, The Machete and I have been avid moviegoers. Unlike many of our friends, we have different "criteria" for what makes a movie good. We don't base our enjoyment <span style="font-style: italic;">solely </span>on things like character development, plot, setting, how much it changed your life or made you think, etc... No, we like to include gunfights, car chases, profane humor, and general ridiculousness. Our friends' opinions of our movie choices has led us to label our cinema-going as "Bad Movie Night."<br /><br />Past greats (in our book anyway) include such gems as <span style="font-style: italic;">Sin City </span>and <span style="font-style: italic;">300</span>. These movies are no-holds-barred in-your-face ass-kicking cinematic masterpieces (to us). You get out of the theater and just want to punch someone square in the temple and/or talk about how well it was written, how you truly appreciated the actor's portrayal of the character, how much the stunning visuals or the soundtrack added to the experience, etc... Movies like these remind me of the subtle nuances experienced while drinking a fine glass of red wine with a bloody 24 ounce ribeye.<br /><br />Films like these and the LoTR trilogy don't come along that often, however. Some movies are highly entertaining but, well, not that great for their blatant use of the "plot stick"*** (<span style="font-style: italic;">The Matrix, </span><span style="font-style: italic;">28 Days Later</span>). Some are mindless entertainment (<span style="font-style: italic;">Hitman</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Live Free or Die Hard, </span>I'm sure<span style="font-style: italic;"> Rambo</span>). Some had potential but are actually too much and you end up leaving the theater feeling terrible about yourself (<span style="font-style: italic;">Hostel</span>). Some are really funny (<span style="font-style: italic;">Knocked Up</span>). Some really make you think (<span style="font-style: italic;">Donnie Darko, Sunshine</span>). Some just purely suck (<a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/search?q=dragon+wars"><span style="font-style: italic;">Dragon Wars</span></a>).<br /><br />So remember, when reading our reviews, don't take them even slightly seriously.<br /><br />*** The "Plot Stick" is the worst of the cinematic tools a director or writer will use when guiding moviegoers. In a nutshell, it's when they assume the audience is stupid and, in a <span style="font-style: italic;">Deus Ex Machina</span> maneuver, have a character come in and explain the entire damn movie. AKA "hitting the audience over the head with the Plot Stick."Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-3178959205790898572008-01-15T11:28:00.000-05:002008-01-15T12:38:06.597-05:005 Little ThingsI am bad at keeping New Year's Resolutions. Really bad. By the second week I am usually skipping the gym, eating cheese steaks and onion rings for dinner every night, spending money frivolously, and generally wasting what could be productive time.<br /><br />I believe the problem is I try to make huge lifestyle changes to achieve grandiose goals. Things like going to the gym every single day for an hour, eating according to a super-restrictive diet, or planning out every minute of every day look good on paper, but are just too much to jump right into, especially when they just don't fit with my lifestyle. I hate the gym (it's expensive and boring), I can't stand crash diets (because I usually crash into a pile of cheese steaks and onion rings), and trying to get a tight, iron-bound grip on finances and time management is impossible (for me, anyway).<br /><br />So this year I'm going at it a little differently. Instead of making ridiculously huge lifestyle changes, I'm going to follow a few little rules and guidelines I'm setting up for myself. I think a few small changes and tactical maneuvers will fit easier into my life, and therefor meet with greater success.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1. Try to be in bed by 11 or 11:30 every night (during the week).</span> There really is no reason for me to be up later than this every night anyway - nothing else is on TV, the video game or book I'm working on will be there tomorrow, and if I'm at a bar this late during the week, I've got bigger problems. 7 to 8 hours of sleep a night supposedly does wonders for your health, metabolism, and productivity (you're less of an ADHD kid without a PSP).<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Benefits:</span> Health, Productivity, Mood<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Stumbling Blocks: </span> Video Games<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2. Get up a half an hour earlier every day.</span> This gives me enough time for a quick "wake up" work out and a decent healthy breakfast. I'm also not scrambling around in the morning like a nut to get ready, which can put me in a REALLY bad mood. Plus, if I stick to rule 1, I'm still getting a full night sleep.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Benefits: </span> Productivity, Health, Mood<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Stumbling Blocks:</span> Snooze Button, General Laziness.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3. Ride the bike to work every possible day.</span> I recently moved to Northern Liberties, I work in Center City, and it's like three miles. It's cheap, it wakes me up int he morning, and like the guy who always rides his ten-speed says: "It's a good workout." Seriously, parking passes in Center City are a small fortune. Septa is ok when it rains, but I like coming and going on my own schedule and not having to buy monthly passes for that, either. It's kinda cool too, finding different routes and seeing all of the city. No, Tacy, I will not become a bike messenger.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Benefits:</span> Health, Financial<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Stumbling Blocks: </span> Weather, Laziness<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">4. Cook for myself and pack a lunch.</span> Going out to lunch or dinner or even just picking up take-out every day is neither economical nor healthy (if you get good take out). Shopping and cooking for yourself allows you to chose your ingredients and control (control better, anyways) what you put into your body. Also, I'm not half bad in the kitchen, and this gives me more room to experiment.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Benefits:</span> Financial, Health<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Stumbling Blocks:</span> Living near the Foodery and Honey's.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">5. Fold and iron laundry when it's done.</span> Yes, I know this sounds ridiculous. But this will save me massive amounts of time and trouble. When I let ironing go until the morning (when I am groggy and uncoordinated) it takes me at least 20 minutes to iron a shirt and pants for work as I fumble around. It completely bombs my little morning routine which then throws off the rest of the day for some unknown reason. When everything is all ready to go and easy to find, it just makes everything else go so smoothly.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Benefits:</span> Productivity, Mood<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Stumbling Blocks: </span> Laziness<br /><br />So far I've generally been able to keep up with all of them pretty easily, and things are going well. Better mood, generally healthier, more energy, etc...Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-46462614033785072412008-01-10T08:59:00.000-05:002008-12-09T08:55:35.963-05:00A Bone to Pick...So, Karen and I have a little mystery on our hands...<br /><br />The other night, Karen went to take some garbage to the shoot at the end of our hallway. Upon returning, she looked a little "weirded out." She informed me there was a pile of bones in front of our neighbor's door.<br /><br />I immediately thought she meant someone was taking their trash down the hall when the bag ripped and they rudely decided not to clean it up. I picked up our other bag of trash and ventured into the hallway to dump that one as well, half expecting to see a bunch of nasty chicken or beef bones sitting in a pile of garbage in front of our poor neighbor's door.<br /><br />What I actually saw was pretty creepy. It looked as if someone had taken old, dessicated bones and arranged them in an "S" pattern in front of their door. Admittedly I am not a zoologist, however working in enough restaurants leads me to believe these were not leftover chicken bones, unless they came from <a href="http://www3.uwm.edu/arts/highlight_images/chicken/1.jpg">here</a>. Seriously, these bones were pretty large and very old. See for yourself.<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijFLlmf8BVODPiPV8UTiZ14eub6tRzC-IO3mZGyp0TBpJuD55JKqVVfGmJ8QUjOtfpT4mfStocyr1DWDM_FEsVr3SWL4BEvSyh6eghfrVbJflng4diGUoKoyOJPyf2DwCt_eqhrI4MZoc/s1600-h/HPIM0155.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijFLlmf8BVODPiPV8UTiZ14eub6tRzC-IO3mZGyp0TBpJuD55JKqVVfGmJ8QUjOtfpT4mfStocyr1DWDM_FEsVr3SWL4BEvSyh6eghfrVbJflng4diGUoKoyOJPyf2DwCt_eqhrI4MZoc/s320/HPIM0155.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153854050898926370" border="0" /></a><br />We decided to knock on our neighbors' door (a really nice couple), and let them know. They seemed a little put off by it as well, so we cleaned them up and tossed them into the old chute. Karen and I immediately began our online search for spells, hexes, and other possible meanings, but came up empty handed.<br /><br />Later that night our water turned to blood, locusts filled our apartment, and <span style="font-style: italic;">Who's the Boss</span> was on every station. I had to fight off a skeletal band of evil ninjas wielding electric guitars and katanas using my amazing martial arts skillz. We just attributed those events to <a href="http://server6.theimagehosting.com/image.php?img=noname.4f5.jpg">The Sass</a>'s presence, though.<br /><br />Ok, that last paragraph of stuff didn't happen. But the rest was true. So if you know anything about magic bone pile arrangements (or more than the mystical <a href="http://www.google.com/">Gu-Gol</a> did), let us know.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4840019555038080108.post-24197857893466449562008-01-09T11:49:00.000-05:002008-01-09T20:28:53.721-05:00My 10 Favorite Things of 2007Well, admittedly this is a complete ripoff of <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2007/12/top-10-favorite-things-about-2007.html">Mr. Yeager's Blog</a>. After reading his, I got to thinking about what my "Top 10 Favorite Things of 2007" would be. This year has undoubtedly been a great year, and it seemed like every time I turned around, something awesome happened. That made narrowing this list down to 10 things very difficult.<br /><br />Disclaimer: When making my list I left out one significant thing that happened in 2007: meeting Karen and getting engaged. That, at least in my opinion, is a huge life-changing series of events that will go in the "Top 10 Favorite Things of My Life" list. Maybe even #2 right behind video games!!! I'm going to get hit with a bottle of <a href="http://www.achouffe.be/">Le Chouffe</a> for that comment. I will have to face the feline wrath and evil powers of <a href="http://server6.theimagehosting.com/image.php?img=noname.4f5.jpg">The Sass</a> (student of the great <a href="http://server6.theimagehosting.com/image.php?img=bigtroublelittlechina1.jpg">David Lo Pan</a>)...<br /><br />But I digress...<br /><br />10. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Our little Fantasy Football League</span>. The whole thing was a complete mess from the get-go and never once failed to deliver on ludacris hilarity. Trades were plentiful and rediculous, the polls were obscenely funny, the boasts were unabashed, Karen drafted a team based exclusively on criminal record and how often a player made an ass out of themselves with their big mouths, and Chuck "Machete" Garcia, who didn't even show up for the draft, started with about six kickers on his team, and logged in maybe five times throughout the season managed to win the championship.<br /><br />Yes, he did have Tom Brady.<br /><br />9. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Bad movie night</span>. To this day people still don't understand why Chuck and I purposely spend money to see bad movies. Many of our friends enjoy movies with "sugar coatings" like character development, intelligent and well-thought-out plots, witty dialog, budgets, etc... They like to feel all warm and fuzzy or sad and weepy or at least get some kind of emotional response from their cinema experience.<br /><br />Yes, we appreciate those things as well from time to time. We also appreciate a good chainsaw to the face, lots of profanity, fast cars, vapid lines, monsters, inbred hill people, and many, many gunfights. Highlights from this banner 2007 year include <span style="font-style: italic;">Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem</span> (not to be confused with <span style="font-style: italic;">Requiem for a Dream</span>), <span style="font-style: italic;">Ghost Rider, The Hills Have Eyes II</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Hannibal Rising</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Grindhouse</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">28 Weeks Later</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Halloween</span>, <span style="font-style: italic;">Saw IV</span>, and <span style="font-style: italic;">Hitman</span>.<br /><br />Two movies really stood out this year, however. First was <span style="font-style: italic;">300</span>. Much like <span style="font-style: italic;">Sin City</span>, it had all the violence, bloodshed, profanity, and sex that Chuck and I enjoy in our "bad movie night" cinema, but also managed to be a good movie to boot (like with believable actors and a plot and all). Who'd'a thunk it!!! (This movie was also Karen and my first blind date, and when she snickered at all the carnage, I knew I had a keeper.)<br /><br />The other was <span style="font-style: italic;">Dragon Wars</span>, or <span style="font-style: italic;">D-Wars</span> as it was also called. In theory, this movie had all the earmarks of a good "bad movie night" flick - crazy CGI dragons destroying LA, flying dragons locked in combat with Apache helicopters, dragons with cannons on their backs, etc... The movie turned out to be legitimately horrible, however. In Chuck's words "that movie made the <span style="font-style: italic;">Dungeons & Dragons</span> movie look like <span style="font-style: italic;">Lord of the Rings</span>. The <span style="font-weight: bold;">second </span><span style="font-style: italic;">Dungeons & Dragons</span> movie. Like the SciFi Channel one." Here is the <a href="http://soulkerfuffle.blogspot.com/2007/09/full-review-of-dragon-wars.html">full review</a> I gave Yeager. It seriously was the first movie I almost walked out of and absolutely hands down the worst movie of all time.<br /><br />8. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Computer Building</span>. All my life I've been developing different variations of what my mom endearingly calls "Frankencomputers." That is when I take all the parts from all of the computers she desperately needs for work and combine them into one super computer which <span style="font-style: italic;">usually </span>works. This year, I built one completely from scratch with the help of <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.newegg.com">Newegg</a> (best computer part site ev4r), Chuck, and his dad. Yeager provided moral support in the form of teasing me that I should just get a Mac. It was a great do-it-yourself project that I liken to guys working on classic muscle cars, except way geekier. It's definitely my favorite new hobby.<br /><br />What I built was a monster!!! The most powerful gaming machines on the market couldn't hold a candle to it!!! Look at it in all its majesty!!! Ok, seriously, the thing worked way better than expected and I saved a ton building it myself. I learned a lot about computers and Chuck and I had fun tweaking it.<br /><br />That was January 2007. Now it is falling behind the curve... Time to rebuild it. Stronger. Faster. More Expensive!!! It really is like working with classic muscle cars, except geeky.<br /><br />I will not buy a Mac.<br /><br />7. <span style="font-weight: bold;">The 2007 PA Renaissance Faire</span>. Turkey legs. Swords. Mead. Swords. Beer. Axes. Swords. More Beer. More Turkey Legs. Nothing else need be said.<br /><br />6. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Tai Chi</span>. I have been interested in Martial Arts since my uncles let me watch violent action movies in the 80s (without telling my grandmom, of course - I was about 8 years old). I started out taking Judo and Jiu Jitsu when I was a kid, but really got into it in college when I studied Wing Chun Kung Fu. After I transferred, I fell out of practice, but my interest never really dwindled. Last year, my friend Phil convinced me to join his martial arts school, and I found what is probably my favorite martial art to date: Tai Chi.<br /><br />I'm not talking about the New Age "find your soulmate, Homer" Tai Chi that aging hippies do to "decompress their auras," maaaaaaan. No, this is the centuries-old Chinese Martial Art known as Tai Chi Chuan, which translates to "Supreme Ultimate Fist" or "Great Extremes Boxing" depending on your dialect. Yes, there is a lot of emphasis on balance, mental centering, and overall health improvement, which is great for my knees, ankles, and every other part of my body currently held together with titanium and duct tape. I really enjoy the "I'm going to kick your ass" and "I'll stab you with this sword" aspects as well, which are often downplayed in New Age Tai Chi (Tai Chi Lite or Diet Tai Chi Latte).<br /><br />5. <span style="font-weight: bold;">NC-52</span><span style="font-weight: bold;">. </span><span>NC-52 was the first conceptual design I got to work on. It's a project that doesn't even exist yet and may not ever happen, but I got to apply a lot of my education and creativity (with some very helpful guidance from my boss), start to finish, including the $200M cost estimate.<br /><br />It's kind of a point of pride for me. I talk with Yeager about this all the time, but looking back about seven years, the only thing I would have with a $200M price tag would be a bar tab. I feel like I've come a long way since those days when I <span style="font-style: italic;">said </span>I was an engineering student - you know, signing up for and never attending engineering classes because it would get in the way of the party schedule. I guess we're all afraid of growing up at one time or another. Then we do and realize that growing up not only isn't all that bad, it's fun (and you can afford crazy things like rent and cell phone bills and food!!!). You don't have to stop having fun, but your definitions may change.<br /><br />Still don't know when I'm ever going to use Differential Equations, though.<br /></span><br />4. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Burning Empires</span>. I have been playing RPGs for a long time now. For almost the past decade I've been gaming with the same few guys. Not only did I think that I knew all of their sneakiest tricks, but that I had used all of my shady and clever ideas up as well.<br /><br />I was very wrong.<br /><br />The level of RP and sneaky, underhanded (and entertaining) trickery rivals the 2008 Presidential Race. And there is no preparation whatsoever (again, mirroring the 2008 Presidential Race). All we do is show up and have an intense, mind-blowing game full of large-scale battles, deceits, debates, and most importantly, shenanigans. Shenanigans of course being complete plot twists, turns, and reversals of fortune within the three minute time frame of one "color scene."<br /><br />It's everything an RPG should be and I can not wait to start playing again.<br /><br />3. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Alison's New Job</span>. It may actually be the All-American Karma-Based Story of how hard work, dedication, and sacrifice can actually pay off in the end. For those who don't know, my sister Alison spent every week since her graduation from NYU auditioning for any part she could get her hands on. She had a few extra shots in movies and TV here and there, but really wanted to get something steady in musical theater (where she is immensely talented).<br /><br />Since she did not have her magic equity card yet, she had to show up for auditions before dawn and wait sometimes 10 -12 hours for a quick tryout that the casting people may or may not have paid attention to. In addition to that, she got fired via text message over the summer from a bartending job (classy management, for sure) for taking a day off (huh?) and lived in a very dangerous neighborhood in New York so she could continue to get to auditions on time. I felt sick every time she related stories about old men and women getting beat up on her front stoop and when she showed us videos of her practicing where you could hear gunshots in the background clear as day. Parents were not pleased.<br /><br />Anywho, right before Christmas, she finally caught a break. Theaterworks cast her as a lead in one of their touring companies for a Children's Show. She gets to travel all over the country (and away from stray bullets and broad daylight assaults), has a steady paycheck and <span style="font-style: italic;">health insurance</span>, and finally has her magical equity card, which means she can wake up at a normal hour for her future auditions. And she can move to a part of town that is relatively safe.<br /><br />Thank god.<br /><br />2. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Northern Libs</span>.<span style="font-weight: bold;"> </span>Karen and I moved this past November to Northern Liberties in Philadelphia, and it was probably one of the best decisions of my life (even factoring in how much I hate moving). For starters, we're saving about ten to fifteen hours a week commuting, which is like getting an extra day in the week or a full night of sleep every night, depending on how you look at it. We're also near a lot of fun bars and restaurants (if you haven't gone to Honey's Sit and Eat, you haven't ever truly eaten). And let me tell you, it's nice having a social life again. I think we both just really enjoy having everything we could possibly want right at our doorstep and city life in general, especially in our own little neighborhood.<br /><br />Saabulous Prime is enjoying retirement, as well.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></span><span>1.</span><span style="font-weight: bold;"> My Friends and Family</span>. I'm not trying to be sappy, so hear me out. 2006 was an odd year for me. Actually, it was an odd year for my alternative online personas.<span style="font-style: italic;"></span> 2007 was a complete 180 in terms of actually getting out of my room and doing stuff with the people in my life who truly matter. Being able to reconnect (by disconnecting) with family and friends and do things like go to the Ren Faire, enjoy the holidays, have fun at Dan's bachelor party and wedding, attend Craigcon (I know your dark secret), see my friends, spend time down the shore, and especially to get engaged is very satisfying and uplifting. It just reminds me that the people in my life now are really the best people ever, hands down.<br /><br />Honorable mention: Blackberry Mapquest, Le Chouffe, Honey's Turkey Meatloaf and Mac&CheeseUnknownnoreply@blogger.com5